"The sign on the bar said: 'girls- topless,……" — Rodney Dangerfield
"The sign on the bar said: 'girls- topless, bottomless', I went inside and there was nobody there!"
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Rodney Dangerfield
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181 Quotes by Rodney Dangerfield
Rodney Dangerfield has 181 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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I'm at the age where I want two girls. In case I fall asleep they will have someone to talk…
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What a dog I got, he found out we look alike, so he killed himself.
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I told my doctor I wonna stop aging, he gave me a gun!
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Last week I told my psychiatrist, 'I keep thinking about suicide', and he told me from now I have to…
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My wife made me join a bridge club... I jump off next Tuesday.
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I remember I was so depressed I was going to jump out a window on the tenth floor; they sent…
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I was an ugly kid; when I was born, after the doctor cut the cord, he hung himself.
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I told my kids, "Someday, you'll have kids of your own." One of them said, "So will you."
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I tell ya, I was an ugly kid. I was so ugly that my dad kept the kid's picture that…
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My boy is a mean kid. I came home the other day and saw him taping worms to the sidewalk,…
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I told my wife a man is like wine, he gets better with age. She locked me in the cellar.
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You can name your own salary in this business. I call mine Fred.
See all 181 quotes by Rodney Dangerfield »
More Bar Quotes
This quote is filed under Bar Quotes,
one of 855 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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Hemingway is terribly limited. His technique is good for short stories, for people who meet once in a bar very…
— Wystan Hugh Auden
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When a little more than a teenager, I was a piano-bar pianist in the land where I was born and…
— Andrea Bocelli
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The American legal industry is a medieval guild in which the prosecutors, bar, and bench join hands to ensure that…
— Conrad Black
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I started out mopping floors, waiting tables, and tending bar at my dad's tavern. I put myself through school working…
— John Boehner
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My dad and my uncles owned a bar outside of Cincinnati. I worked there growing up, mopping floors, waiting tables.
— John Boehner
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The need to be right all the time is the biggest bar to new ideas.
— Edward de Bono
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The girl I find who wants to talk about quantum theory in a bar is the one I want to…
— Brandon Boyd
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When I go to a bar, I don't go looking for a girl who knows the capital of Maine.
— David Brenner
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I'm the type of person who doesn't want to sit alone in a restaurant or bar.
— Malin Akerman
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I can only say the first thing that pops into my mind is I remember, years ago, seeing kind of…
— Jimmy Buffett
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We have wasted History like a bunch of drunks shooting dice back in the men's crapper of the local bar.
— Charles Bukowski
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Now one thing I think is really lame, is if you're an artist and you go to a karaoke bar…
— Jason Aldean
See all 855 Bar Quotes »