Books Quote by Robert Benchley

I have often wondered how they manage to get return envelopes which miss, by one-quarter of an inch, fitting the blank you are supposed…

— Robert Benchley

My first big mistake was made when, in a moment of weakness, I consented to learn the game; for a man who can frankly…

— Robert Benchley

You might think that after thousands of years of coming up too soon and getting frozen, the crocus family would have had a little…

— Robert Benchley

It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I…

— Robert Benchley

But ice-crunching and loud gum-chewing, together with drumming on tables, and whistling the same tune 70 times in succession, because they indicate an indifference…

— Robert Benchley

There is no such place as Budapest. Perhaps you are thinking of Bucharest, and there is no such place as Bucharest, either.

— Robert Benchley

I am both a public and a private school boy myself, having always changed schools just as the class in English in the new…

— Robert Benchley

Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed be doing at that moment.

— Robert Benchley

After an author has been dead for some time, it becomes increasingly difficult for his publishers to get out a new book by him…

— Robert Benchley

One of the chief duties of the fan is to engage in arguments with the man behind him. This department of the game has…

— Robert Benchley

“There are two kinds of people in the world: those who divide the world into two kinds of people, and those who do not.”

— Robert Benchley

Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?

— Robert Benchley