Jesus Quote by Max von Sydow

If Jesus came back and saw what was being done in his name, he'd never stop throwing up.

— Woody Allen

“If Jesus came back and saw what's going on in his name, he'd never stop throwing up.”

— Woody Allen

“If Jesus came back and saw what was going on in his name, he'd never stop throwing-up.”

— Woody Allen

If Jesus came back today, I think he'd throw up.

— Jesse Ventura

If Jesus Christ were to come today, people would not even crucify him. They would ask him to dinner, and hear what he had…

— Thomas Carlyle

Somehow Jesus's reputation has survived all the embarrassing things that Christians have done in his name.

— Shane Claiborne

God would never throw something your way if he didn't think you could handle it.

— Anonymous

“Jesus shook his head slowly from side to side, then thrust his left hand deep into Santa’s sack. Out came something resembling raw steak,…

— Phillip Andrew Bennett Low

Jesus would have gone to Ellen Degeneres' house for dinner and had a good time. What would we be saying about him?

— Mike Messerli

But when he (Peter) saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, Lord, save me! Immediately Jesus reached out his…

— Bible

If Jesus were playing the game, I don't know what he'd do.

— Lisa Whelchel

You never hear Jesus say in Pilate's judgement hall one word that would let you imagine that He was sorry that He had undertaken…

— Charles Spurgeon