Quote by K.M. Golland

“I’d fire that woman if I knew how to operate a vacuum.”

— Joey W. Hill

“The old vacuum cleaner keeps dying on her over and over until at last the cleaning woman scares it by yelling: "Motherfucker!”

— Lydia Davis

“I’d rather make love to a robot than a politician, because it’d be more personable. Anyway, talking vacuum cleaners with flesh and suits freak…

— Jarod Kintz

“This woman keeps buying things to toss in the hungry mouth of the vacuum sneaking up behind her.”

— Tomas Tranströmer

“Robotic vacuums can clean better than conventional vacuums.”

— Steven Magee

“Someone should take a vacuum cleaner to his sentences.”

— John Searles

Yeah, and Mom also said for you to stop sticking your dick in the vacuum cleaner! -Buffy Gilmore

— Scary Movie

“Has something happened to upset you today?” “Yeah, I had an argument with a vacuum cleaner hose, it wanted me to it a blowjob,…

— Gillibran Brown

“He sniffed her. The rubbery black nose inhaled deeply as it passed back and forth over her face, along her throat, her ears. Jeez,…

— Dani Harper

“She felt as if she were being sucked dry by little vampires. End up like one of those pruney leather guys you see scuttling…

— K.W. Jeter

“If I were a robot, and I got cheated on with a vacuum cleaner, I’d question my cleanliness. I’d also wonder if dating a…

— Jarod Kintz

“So does that mean you're neat and tidy, since you're a woman ?" I scrunched up my face. "Are you kidding ? I used…

— Karina Halle