"He's so fat, he can be his own…" — Johnny Carson
"He's so fat, he can be his own running mate."
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Johnny Carson
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55 Quotes by Johnny Carson
Johnny Carson has 55 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have…
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I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the…
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If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.
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I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing.
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Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.
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If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
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Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.
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Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do.
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Talent alone won't make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you…
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Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president.
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Anytime four New Yorkers get into a cab together without arguing, a bank robbery has just taken place.
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For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off.
See all 55 quotes by Johnny Carson »
More Fat Quotes
This quote is filed under Fat Quotes,
one of 1,584 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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All fat women look the same; they all look 42.
— Margaret Atwood
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Nobody wants a fat lead singer.
— Sebastian Bach
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Americans like fat books and thin women.
— Russell Baker
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I think one of the biggest things that affects young women is when they hear their mothers using fat talk.
— Tyra Banks
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It's okay to be fat. So you're fat. Just be fat and shut up about it.
— Roseanne Barr
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Nobody wanted the 'Roseanne' show. I heard from agents that there was no interest in a show about a fat…
— Roseanne Barr
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'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.
— Dave Barry
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I grew up in a family that was multifaceted, sexually oriented, and pretty much open to everything. And because I…
— Drew Barrymore
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American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat…
— Dave Barry
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I feel like some of my baby fat is going away, and that's not just physically, it's psychologically. I think…
— Drew Barrymore
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There is no dream of love, however ideal it may be, which does not end up with a fat, greedy…
— Charles Baudelaire
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I find the female tragedy of insecurity to be hilarious. We get obsessed over issues like the tiny skin tags…
— Lake Bell
See all 1,584 Fat Quotes »