Door Quote by Hasan Minhaj

“Every time a U.S.A. Today slides underneath my door, it's like they're saying, 'Hey, you're not that smart, right?'”

Hasan Minhaj

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I've found the 90-10 rule to be pretty true: 90 percent of what I come up with and write down is kinda 'eh,' and…

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When you immerse yourself in a community, you tend to rise in that community.

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Aditi is a comedy superstar over in India. She's only one of three female English-speaking comedians in India.

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A lot of times, especially when it comes to political debates, people get caught up in esoteric statistics. So the realest thing I can…

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A lot of people in the media say that Donald Trump goes golfing too much, which raises a very important question: Why do you…

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As satirists, we get to stand on the sidelines of life and comment on what's happening.

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My dad was the only son from his entire family to come to America, and I was his only son. We had come to…

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When you can tailor your act, you want it to be about yourself but also about the people in the room and the experience…

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I think perspective is a necessary, amazing thing.

Hasan Minhaj

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I like to have straight-up black coffee, but when you get it, sometimes you'll burn your tongue, or it spills on your hands, and you get third degree burns. I happen to be the kind of human being who doesn't want to sue coffee companies for money, so I just say, 'Hey, can you give me some coffee, but can…

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I just started the way most comics start, doing open mic shows around Sacramento and San Francisco, and eventually, I moved to L.A. After…

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Jokes for jokes' sake are kind of meaningless to me. I understand the value of them, but it doesn't speak to me as much.…

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Strange - is it not? That of the myriads who Before us passed the door of Darkness through, Not one returns to tell us…

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I wonder: when a Jehovah's Witness dies and goes to Heaven, does God hide behind the door and pretend He's not home?

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I won't be managing the Mets. I am closing the door on managing the Mets and probably everybody else.

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Couples Therapy' is pretty big for me because it's opening the door to a new audience - a hip-hop following, which I feel is…

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I think you've still got to try to be good, day-to-day. You see a granny, you hold the door open for her. You just…

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Using a public bathroom is an incredibly embarrassing experience. I enter the stall but can't reach the lock on the door.

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If you believe in chakras - head and heart - I think singing opens them up, like a wide open door.

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There's been times where I sold the place out, and I walked in and the guy's like, 'Uh, ID?' 'No, you can't ID me,…

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I wanted to have the no. 1 show on the Discovery channel. I went for it for a very long time, and I was…

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Personally, I'm very private, so when my door is closed, it means I'm unavailable, and when it's open, it doesn't mean you can come…

Tituss Burgess

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Coming from New Zealand and Australia is like a tough pre-school for Hollywood. And having been on 'Neighbours,' even though the agents I met…

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My dream was to have a slide bannister so I could slide down and go out the door to work.

Cynthia Rowley

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Door Quote by Hasan Minhaj

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