"Today, you're 50. Now we can round your……" — Dave Barry

Today, you're 50. Now we can round your age up to 100!… - Dave Barry

"Today, you're 50. Now we can round your age up to 100! Happy 50th birthday!"

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508 Quotes by Dave Barry

Dave Barry has 508 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.
Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting.
Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.
Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the…
The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management…
'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.
The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas balding white men look…
We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but we cannot figure out…
The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.
The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.
Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers…
Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only…

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More Age Quotes

This quote is filed under Age Quotes, one of 9,856 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:

To be free in an age like ours, one must be in a position of authority. That in itself would… — Hannah Arendt
We live in an age of instant knowledge. And there's almost a sense of entitlement to that. — J. J. Abrams
Education is the best provision for old age. — Aristotle
Bashfulness is an ornament to youth, but a reproach to old age. — Aristotle
It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims. — Aristotle
I love things that age well - things that don't date, that stand the test of time and that become… — Giorgio Armani
I knew from the age of 16 that I wanted to be a writer because I just didn't think I… — Paul Auster
The freethinking of one age is the common sense of the next. — Matthew Arnold
You can fake your age or mask it, but the passion that moves the characters has to be real. — Victoria Abril
In every age 'the good old days' were a myth. No one ever thought they were good at the time.… — Brooks Atkinson
Another belief of mine; that everyone else my age is an adult, whereas I am merely in disguise. — Margaret Atwood
For years I wanted to be older, and now I am. — Margaret Atwood

See all 9,856 Age Quotes »