« All Humorous Quotes · Ambrose Bierce's Page
Humorous Quotes by Ambrose Bierce
- There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.
- Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
- An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
- What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would…
- I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are Democrats.
- The covers of this book are too far apart.
- Litigant. A person about to give up his skin for the hope of retaining his bones.
- The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable Christian forebearance among men.
More Humorous Quotes
- Wit is educated insolence. — Aristotle
- The gods too are fond of a joke. — Aristotle
- It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims. — Aristotle
- People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do. — Isaac Asimov
- I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them. — Isaac Asimov
- Meanwhile, fears of universal disaster sank to an all time low over the world. — Isaac Asimov
- O Lord, help me to be pure, but not yet. — Saint Augustine
- Give me chastity and continence, but not yet. — Saint Augustine
- If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner. — Tallulah Bankhead
- No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. — Honore de Balzac
- It is easier to be a lover than a husband for the simple reason that it is more difficult to be witty… — Honore de Balzac
- Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss. — Douglas Adams