Hands Get Quotes by Robert Schimmel

More Quotes by Robert Schimmel

Robert Schimmel has 23 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

• Because when you’re laughing, there is no other emotion in that moment except for joy.
• What do you say when your friends come to visit and the dog starts humping their leg. Well, if it's a pit…
• So my wife said she read this article in a magazine and she said: 'You know, maybe you're suffering from premature ejaculation.'…
• Caution: Anal intercourse may lead to irregular heart rhythms. Yeah, you know I'm never gonna have to worry about that. Because God…
• One of my friends goes: 'So, you know what really turns me on; when girls talk dirty in bed.' Yeah I tried…
• What is it with the animals with the bikes? I took my daughter to the circus. She said: 'Daddy, how do they…
• So because of my act my daughter thinks she can talk to me about anything. She's been dating the same guy since…
• I sit down with my daughter and I said, 'Do you know how babies get here?' And she said, 'Well, the lady…
• It's my mission to try and give people fighting the disease the same gifts of laughter and a positive attitude I had.…
• I was making love one night with my wife and she said: 'You're in me.' I know where I am, shut the…
• Why are hemorrhoids called hemorrhoids and asteroids called asteroids? Wouldn't it make more sense if it was the other way around? But…
• I'm not ready to die. Period. To begin with, I cannot imagine a future without me in it. Can't do it.

See all 23 quotes by Robert Schimmel »