Claus Quotes

153 quotes by 134 authors

We have domesticated God's transcendence. We often learn about God at about the same time as we are learning about Santa Claus; but our ideas… — Karen Armstrong
Santa Claus has the right idea - visit people only once a year. — Victor Borge
I don't really care what people tell children - when you believe in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy, one more fib… — Julie Burchill
Nobody shoots at Santa Claus. — Samuel Butler
He was a parade all by himself, a burst of dazzle and jingle, Santa Claus drinking his whiskey straight and groaning with a bellyache... Babe… — Jimmy Cannon
Prayers never bring anything... They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy - but to the enlightened… — W.C. Fields
You remember when you were a kid growing up, and believed in Santa Claus? There's not much difference between Santa Claus and me today, you… — Bobby Knight
A man of fifty looks as old as Santa Claus to a girl of twenty. — William Feather
God is a Republican, and Santa Claus is a Democrat. — H. L. Mencken
If you ever have to steal money from your kid, and later on he discovers it's gone, I think a good thing to do is… — Jack Handey
No sane local official who has hung up an empty stocking over the municipal fireplace is going to shoot Santa Claus just before a hard… — Al Smith
One of the things I had a hard time getting used to when I came to California in '78 was Santa Claus in shorts. — Dennis Franz
Postal officials say that before Christmas they receive tons of letters written to Santa Claus, but after Christmas how few letters of thanks are sent… — Robert E. Lee
A cynic is just a man who found out when he was ten that there wasn't any Santa Claus, and he's still upset. — James Gould Cozzens
The saddest moment in a child's life is not when he learns that Santa Claus isn't real, it's when he learns that Vince Russo is. — Jim Cornette
How is Christmas regarded today? The legend of Santa Claus, the Christmas tree, the decorations of tinsel and mistletoe, and the giving of gifts all… — Howard W. Hunter
Well when I was a kid, I asked Santa Claus for some toys. Santa Claus wrote me a letter that he lost his bag. He… — Benicio Del Toro
Maybe that whole love thing is just a grown-up version of Santa Claus; just a myth we've been fed since childhood. So, we keep buying… — Meg Ryan
What I have against religion is that they start you when you are so defenseless. I mean, I was three when they started pumping this… — Bill Maher
I was Santa Claus in first year of primary school, our elementarys school play, because I had most panache, that was probably why. I was… — James Frecheville

Who Wrote These Claus Quotes

134 authors contributed a total of 153 Claus Quotes, led by these top contributors: