“I quickly tried to do the math but my brain was a jumbled mess and I couldn’t remember what number comes after… — Tara Sivec Mathematics Copy Share Image
“There has never, nor will there ever be, any other woman in this world more special to me than you.”q” — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Money can't buy happiness but it can buy chocolate, which is kind of the same thing.” — Tara Sivec Happiness Copy Share Image
“I suddenly had a vision of my sperm swimming around and talking in Bruce Willis’s voice like in Look Who’s Talking. “Come… — Tara Sivec Dreams Copy Share Image
“London Bridge is in Arizona? When the fuck did this happen? Does London know about this? The queen has got to be… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“It was like the day the stick turned pink, her lady bits put up a giant "Out of Business" sign. Do not… — Tara Sivec Business Copy Share Image
“Give me a cat over a kid any day. You can open up a bag of Meow Mix, plop it down… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“God said "Let there be light" and George morgan flipped the switch.” — Tara Sivec Humor Copy Share Image
“I gained fifty-six pounds when I was pregnant with him. Do you have any idea what it’s like to look down and… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Then grow a pair and get over it. Jesus mother of f*ck Christ in a piss sh*thole, dick for brains, the answer… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Give me a cat over a kid any day. You can open up a bag of Meow Mix, plop it down on… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Climbing into bed, I slide my hands behind my head and stare up at the ceiling. I have no idea who my… — Tara Sivec Parenting Copy Share Image
“It's Life. It's the bumps and the bruises, the pain and the fear; it's messy and it's real and it's not some… — Tara Sivec Fear Copy Share Image
“As I recall, Drew made me take him to see a voodoo priestess he found in the yellow pages that week because… — Tara Sivec Friendship Copy Share Image
“I had the phone in my hand all set to dial when Drew had finally decided to tell me that he pooped… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Why the fuck didn't anyone tell me that four-year-olds get woodys? I am not equipped to deal with this shit, Liz.” — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“I'm sorry, what do you want to order?" "A virgin. I want to order a virgin.” — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“Mommy and Daddy make a lot of noise when they kiss. Mommy talks to God a lot. I talk to God sometimes… — Tara Sivec Talk To God Copy Share Image
“Oh my God, I sent a picture of my boobs to Jim," I moaned as a fresh wave of nausea rolled through… — Tara Sivec Burger king Copy Share Image
“I think maybe I'll hide behind the couch and jump out when he gets here. Put the fear of George into him,"… — Tara Sivec Fear Copy Share Image
“Uncle Drew is completely inappropriate and one hundred percent of the time, and Aunt Jenny is a few fries short of a… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
“She moans her approval, so I continue. “Your pussy is so tight, like trying to get a new My Little Pony out… — Tara Sivec Christianity Copy Share Image
“Death changes everyone. It changes the way you think, the way you feel, and the way you live your life. Sometimes it… — Tara Sivec Death Copy Share Image
