All Seth Meyers Quotes
- Police in California arrested a man who tried to smuggle songbirds into the US by strapping more than a dozen birds to his legs and… Airport
- A pair of identical twins in China married another pair of identical twins. What are the odds of that? Actually, in China, about 3 to… Another Pair
- A Philadelphia museum has rejected a request to test its sample of Abraham Lincoln's blood to see if the 16th president had a rare genetic… Abraham
- JP Morgan Bank is foreclosing on the Long Island mansion owned by Victoria Gotti, the 46-year-old daughter of Mafia boss John Gotti. In related news...the… Bank
- Karta, an orangutan at a zoo in Australia, escaped from her enclosure on Sunday, after she short-circuited an electric fence and broke free. She then… Australia
- Tony Danza has begun work on a new A&E series in which he will spend a year teaching 10th grade English at a New York… Begun
- It was revealed this week that Harrison Ford is engaged to his longtime girlfriend Calista Flockhart. Unfortunately, the news came to light in the final… Calista
- A company in Japan has developed a set of kneepads that allow men to squat down in front of the toilet, reducing the possibility of… Allow
- Treasury secretary Henry Paulson said that the proposed bailout plan will cost taxpayers $700 billion dollars. To give you an idea of how much money… Bailout
- The first presidential debate took place last night, and earlier in the week Barack Obama said he would be at the debate whether John McCain… Barack
- Animal rights group PETA is urging Ben and Jerry's to replace the milk they use in their ice cream with human breast milk. After which,… Animal
- Sunday's 60th Primetime Emmy Awards were hosted by the five reality show nominees in an apparent attempt to make us hate television. Apparent
- Police in Portland, Oregon told a woman who was skating nude to stop after construction workers complained. Which raises the question: what in God's name… Complained
- A New Jersey man is suing two men for allegedly using Facebook to organize an attack on him at a bar. By the time police… Allegedly
- Pope Benedict delivered an anti-euthanasia message this week, saying that people must accept death at 'the hour chosen by God.' And then he rode away… Accept
- Bill Gates, Warren Buffet and Lawrence Ellison top the Forbes list of the top 10 richest people in the U.S. having a combined wealth, as… Bill
- Star Trek's George Takei and his longtime partner, Brad Altman, were married this past Sunday. Set your phasers on STUNNING! The couple vowed to boldly… Altman
- A man in Michigan stole nearly 250 empty beer cans from a 7-11 store and then told police that his crack cocaine habit drove him… Beer
- A tailor in Serbia in planning to make a pair of pants that are large enough to fit 100 men. The story is detailed in… Detailed
- OJ Simpson's trial for kidnapping, armed robbery and assault with a deadly weapon started Monday. Man, you know you've lived a crazy life when a… Armed
- Russell Crowe recently pleaded with Australian authorities to grant entry into the country for his friend Snoop Dogg, who is banned because of his drug… Arrests
- A freshman at Michigan State University was randomly assigned to the same dorm room his father occupied in 1978. A fact that will no doubt… Assigned
- Injured New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, will be replaced by Matt Cassel an untested inexperienced back-up. Earning Cassel the nickname, 'Sarah Palin'. Brady
- Drew Gray, a 5-year-old in Illinois scored a hole-in-one at a par 3 golf course this week, though he still finished the day 229 over… Course
- A middle school teacher in Montana suffered some bruising and a large scratch on his back after he struck a bear while riding his bicycle… Bear