“But this is going to be difficult enough without running my words through a filter of illiteracy.” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“That wasn't English she was speaking: it was the language of diplomacy.” — Kevin Hearne Diplomacy Copy Share Image
“Hopefully next time I won't be recovering from an assassination attempt, and then I'll do better.” — Kevin Hearne Assassination Copy Share Image
“Silly cop, I don't need your help; I have a werewolf on retainer.” — Kevin Hearne Humor Copy Share Image
“Well, look at the bright side, Granuaile. Emo Douche Bags would be a great band name.” ” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“Don’t hate the Meat Lord, Atticus. Just offer him steak sauce and words of praise.” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
its difficult to dislike a man who takes pleasure in giving away free beer. — Kevin Hearne Beer Copy Share Image
“It sounds like these guys would be filed under Assholes Who Do Evil Shit in My Name.” “Jesus. I mean, wow. That’s… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“In the pattern of the curdling cheese she divined the future, the complex patterns revealing truth to her far more clearly than… — Kevin Hearne Time Copy Share Image
“the universe is exactly the size that your soul can encompass. Some people live in extremely small worlds, and some live in… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
My mouth gaped and I think I might have whimpered. The Norns had obliterated him completely—a creature they’d known for centuries—because of… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“So after I killed him and stowed his body next to the doe, I sampled his smoothie concoction in the parking lot… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“Thunder gods don't hide." The Russian shrugged. "I am not like Thor. I have Russian depth of character. And I like to… — Kevin Hearne Help people Copy Share Image
“Like many silly codes of bravery and manliness, the meat of my father’s instruction on how to die well can be distilled… — Kevin Hearne Courage Copy Share Image
“Celibacy is a terrible idea, adhered to by people who hate themselves and want everyone else to do the same. You should… — Kevin Hearne Celibacy Copy Share Image
“He could focus my attention on how perfectly sublime life can be at times. Such moments are ephemeral, and without his guidance… — Kevin Hearne Focus Copy Share Image
Here is how you know someone has had a good idea: Other people freely admit to their friends that said idea has… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“What sealed the deal for me was that the cloak wouldn't come off without a generous donation of my tears. Those used… — Kevin Hearne Dreams Copy Share Image
“But in doing so—moving forward, in Greta’s mind—he’s still dealing with the past. It’s always strung out behind us, innit, attached to… — Kevin Hearne Time Copy Share Image
“Did you get me that movie about Genghis Khan? 'It's in the Netflix queue, but that's not the surprise. You don't need… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“What Sherlock does is train his mind to remember details, access them as needed, and then spy the hidden pattern in them.… — Kevin Hearne Psychology Copy Share Image
“I quietly cast camouflage on myself, which is the nearest I can come to invisibility. It binds my pigment to my surroundings,… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
Icy glares from vampires are far icier than icy glares from people and when the vampire giving you an icy glare is… — Kevin Hearne Body Copy Share Image
You are telling me that your lawyer is a bloodsucking vampire? — Kevin Hearne Lawyer Copy Share Image
Lie down and offer your throat. No, wait, that's how dogs submit. I know! Offer her you're wallet!" Oberon — Kevin Hearne Dog Copy Share Image
“Leif stared at me, utterly still, the way only vampires and pet rocks can manage.” — Kevin Hearne Humor Copy Share Image
“Oberon:"She's a very clever girl, the kind you dont' take home to Ogma.” — Kevin Hearne Clever Copy Share Image
“That’s what a skinwalker is: a mean asshole with a meaner spirit squatting inside.” Oberon said. ” — Kevin Hearne Atticus-finch Copy Share Image
“Missing people in our lives are like wounds we reopen with thoughts.” — Kevin Hearne Missing people Copy Share Image
“I just starred at him like he was trying to sell me the Sham-wow and the Slapchop for only $19.99” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
You don't need to say any special incantation or sacrifice a stray cat or something first? — Kevin Hearne Cat Copy Share Image
“should be going in there with a thousand naked warriors who fight like wet cats with dodgy bowels.” — Kevin Hearne Fight Copy Share Image
“It's not like the Middle Ages, when you had the Church and the aristocracy keeping everything nice and stagnant.” — Kevin Hearne Aristocracy Copy Share Image
“never thought I'd see a jaguar brought to its knees by rhino shit." Oberon” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“I thought for the longest time that chicken-fried steak was steak that had been fried by specially trained chickens,” — Kevin Hearne Food Copy Share Image
“Oberon Atticus "Gods below, I think you're right. Quick, to the Geekmobile!” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
