All Joe E. Lewis Quotes
- I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play. 80s
- It doesn't matter whether you are rich or poor - as long as you've got money. Got Money
- There's only one thing money won't buy, and that is poverty. Buy
- I don't like money actually, but it quiets the nerves. Inspirational
- A man is never drunk if he can lay on the floor without holding on. Alcohol
- If you drink like a fish, don't drive: swim. Beer
- I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate… Ate
- I never went to school beyond the 3rd grade, but my mother taught me the difference between right and wrong. Beyond
- Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants on. Both
- Show me a friend in need and I'll show you a pest. Friend
- You can lead a horse to water, but if you can get him to roll over and float on his back, then you got something! Float
- They had me on the operating table all day. They looked into my stomach, my gall bladder, they examined everything inside of me. Know what… All
- Adlai Stevenson has a genius for saying the right thing, at the right time, to the wrong people. Adlai
- Boys, I have been rich and I have been poor, and believe me being rich is better. Been
- I'm still chasing girls. I don't remember what for, but I'm still chasing them. Chasing
- I would take a bomb, but I can't stand the noise. Bomb
- Rooting for the Yankees is like rooting for U.S. Steel. Inspirational
- I've been on such a losing streak that if I had been around I would have taken General Custer and given points. Been
- I met with an accident on the way to the track; I arrived safely. Accident
- I don't drink any more than the man next to me, and the man next to me is Dean Martin. Alcohol
- It pays to get drunk with the best people. Alcohol
- I don’t drink anymore - just the same amount. Amount
- We can afford almost any mistake once. Afford
- I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink. Anyone
- I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I had lost exactly two weeks. Days