All Jimmy Fallon Quotes
- Today President Obama gave a major speech where he defended his handling of the economy. And there were tons of people in the audience, you… Audience
- The U.S. government is selling $30 billion worth of fighter jets to Saudi Arabia. Yeah, it's part of a new initiative called, 'Operation Regret This… Arabia
- Today Mitt Romney visited a firehouse here in New York City. Of course, he was disappointed when he learned that the firehouse is not where… Cities
- President Obama had beer with four unemployed construction workers. And Obama asked the guys what was it like to lose their jobs, and they were… Asked
- You only think of the best comeback when you leave. Best
- A new report found that Facebook has created more than 450,000 jobs. Unfortunately, photos posted on Facebook have ended 550,000 jobs. Created
- The federal government is starting to plan for climate change by making extended forecasts that can help people plan for extreme weather - because what… Accuracy
- President Obama and Mitt Romney both gave commencement speeches over the last few days. Obama was like, 'You can be whatever you want to be,'… Both
- Got Bin Laden AND interrupted Celebrity Apprentice? Win for Obama all around. All
- A new study found that Americans are exercising more than ever but still not losing much weight. Not good in fact, it's all I could… All
- A girl in New York whose parents were on Wife Swap is suing the show for 100-million dollars for making her look like a spoiled… Brat
- Barnes & Noble CEO William Lynch just announced that he is stepping down after three years. When asked if he's looking for a new job,… Announced
- Over the weekend it came out that the U.S. has been listening in on German Chancellor Angela Merkel's cellphone since 2002. At this point, I… Angela
- A 99-year-old man is filing for divorce from his 96-year-old wife, making them the world's oldest divorced couple. It's got to be weird when a… Couple
- In her new book, Sarah Palin says she once gave up chocolate for an entire year just to prove she could do it. Still think… Book
- After facing backlash from customers, Subway says it will remove a chemical in its bread that is also found in yoga mats. Some people were… Backlash
- President Obama is getting a new limousine that will have advanced night-vision capabilities. The technology even has a cool name ... headlights. Advanced
- There's a growing trend of older Americans who are using marijuana in their retirement. That makes sense because old people are always talking about their… Always Talking
- You gotta risk it to get the biscuit. Biscuit
- Sometimes I wish I had a terrible childhood, so that at least I'd have an excuse. Childhood
- Jeb Bush gave a speech yesterday. He had a pretty rough time. He accidentally said that ISIS has 200,000 men instead of 20,000, and then… Accidentally
- In New York, there are so many potholes, they're like craters on the moon. That's another traffic thing. Another Traffic
- Sometimes in a movie, the lines are so perfect. Inspirational
- If people want to see you, they'll find you. If they don't see you on TV, they'll find you on the Internet. Find
- I love Nashville. I've been here so many times... oh man, I would stay here for a year if I could. It's just so much… Been