Daniel Handler Quotes

495 quotes in 5123 categories

• Everyone, at some point in their lives, wakes up in the middle of the night with the feeling that they are all alone in the…
• They're book addicts.
• I suppose I'll have to add the force of gravity to my list of enemies.
• There is nothing particularly wrong with salmon, of course, but like caramel candy, strawberry yogurt, or liquid carpet cleaner, if you eat too much of…
• Stealing, of course, is a crime, and a very impolite thing to do. But like most impolite things, it is excusable under certain circumstances. Stealing…
• The world is quiet here.
• Reading is one form of escape. Running for your life is another.
• lately it has become more and more difficult to attend dinner parties without the evening ending in gunfire or tapioca...
• One can remain alive long past the usual date of disintegration if one is unafraid of change, insatiable in intellectual curiosity, interested in big things,…
• The end of THE END is the best place to begin THE END, because if you read THE END from the beginning of the beginning…
• The only thing he cares about.
• Get out of my way, you cakesniffers!” said a rude, violent, and filthy little girl, shoving the Baudelaire orphans aside as she dashed by.
• It is difficult, when faced with a situation you cannot control, to admit you can do nothing.
• There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you, and there are times to go out into the world and…
• Of course, it is boring to read about boring thing, but it is better to read something that makes you yawn with boredom than something…
• The hallway was lined with numbered doors, odd numbers on one side and even numbers on the other, and large ornamental vases, too large to…
• As I am sure you know, when people say 'It's my pleasure,' they usually mean something along the lines of, 'There's nothing on Earth I…
• But there was more, as there always is when the love goes. She was haunted, naturally. Otherwise what is the point, why leave your rickety…
• Anyone who knew Violet well could tell she was thinking hard, because her long hair was tied up in a ribbon to keep it out…
• Beef. Yes. Roast beef. It's the Swedish term for beef that is roasted.

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