Best Craig Ferguson Quotations
- I do a show. It comes on late at night on TV. And if that means I'm a late-night talk show host, then I guess… Care
- I said that the only way I could have a band that would work in the format of my show is if the band were… Band
- Scotland is a much lighter and more fun place than I thought it was. I was miserable when I was there. But it wasn't Scotland's… Circumstances
- If you don't vote, you're a moron. Inspirational
- Congratulations to the NBA champion Boston Celtics - they beat the Los Angeles Lakers by 39 points. Or as Hillary Clinton would say, "Too close… Angeles
- The Universe is very, very big. It also loves a paradox. For example, it has some extremely strict rules. Rule number one: Nothing lasts forever.… Absolute
- It's a book. It's mine. And it's done. Book
- I didn't say no because between safety and adventure I choose adventure. Adventure
- He will know from and early age that failure is not disgrace. It's just a pitch that you missed, and you'd better get ready for… Age
- I'm always a bit shy around evil people... Bit
- On that same tour we ran into a band at Aylesbury Friars, a biggish venue in Oxfordshire, England. They were a four-piece from Ireland called… Accountants
- I think when you become a parent you go from being a star in the movie of your own life to the supporting player in… From
- I freely admit I'm confused. I'm a confused and troubled individual but at the same time...Its Free! Admit
- Twas the night before Thanksgiving. All the food's in the oven. And I'm in the bedroom performin' self lovin'. All
- If I have a near-beer, I’m near beer. And if I’m near beer, I’m close to tequila. And if I’m close to tequila, I’m adjacent… Adjacent
- It 's the time of year when Canadians mate. Canadians
- I don't just like sexual double entendres I love them, I stroke them, I milk them, I spank them when they're naughty. Double
- The views expressed by Me are in no way endorsed by CBS any of its allied companies or in fact Me. Allied
- Strange star-like object over Oslo right before Obama arrives. A gift of a golden medal given by a group of wise men... Nah. Arrives
- If I start giving people what they like I'll turn into one of them and I don't want to be one of them I want… Giving
- You gotta laugh because if you didn't you'd cry Cry
- I've got mixed feelings about poetry cause done well poetry is fantastic. But not many people are capable of doing it well. I think you… Capable
- I love zombies. If any monster could Riverdance, it would be zombies. Any
- Stand by your bed and salute me. Bed
- Sometimes my pathology just spills out into the camera doesn't it? Camera
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