Cows Quote by Anonymous

Lady met man on and pointed to his suede jacket. You know a cow was murdered for that jacket, she sneered. He replied in…

— Megz

“One of the police found a garden chair that I could stand on and they eyed me suspiciously as I tried to slide through…

— Tom Reynolds

“Dear God!” I screamed and buried my face in my pillow. “What?!” I heard him ask. “Did you see a roach?” “Why are you…

— Wendy Higgins

“The four men were in the kitchen laughing over breakfast when the door slammed open with such force that it knocked a picture off…

— Debra Trueman

I went to a restaurant, and I saw a guy wearing a leather jacket, eating a hamburger, drinking a glass of milk. I said,…

— Mitch Hedberg

She blinked at me, then realized I was panicking. Honestly, it was like admitting to murder before being interrogated. “Ms. Davidson,” she began, but…

— Darynda Jones

“I don’t know, man.” He reached into his inside pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. “Ew!” I recoiled. “You smoke?” “Only when…

— Kyra Davis

She said Robert Joyner had killed himself with a gun. And then I asked why, and then she told me that he was getting…

— John Green

“So, the wooden stake through the heart thing is apparently a myth, but you can be killed by fire. Anything else?" "Should I be…

— Elizabeth Hunter

“Anecdotal Spores: The Crazy Uncle Late one cold and drizzly winter night while I was traveling through the mountains, I stopped in a roadside…

— Matt Hughes

I once overheard the sweetest old woman behind me on a train tell her adorable old husband as he scoffed down a ham sandwich…

— Dane Cook

“My cousin, Red Buffalo, has said false words to you? If this is so, you will tell me.” “As if you don’t know what…

— Catherine Anderson