You might be a redneck if Quotes · Page 6

If you think 'loading the dishwasher' means 'getting your wife drunk', you might be a redneck

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House…

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if three quarters of the clothes you own have logos on them.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if during your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol…

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if...Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you have refused to watch the Academy Awards since Smokey and the Bandit was snubbed for…

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare…

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you've ever stood in line to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if...the most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if...you think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary…

— Jeff Foxworthy