You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if an expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if the receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if... your high school basketball game got rained out. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you have to check in the bottom of your shoe for change so you can get… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if the first words out of your mouth every time you see friends are Howdy!, Hey! or… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass, you might be… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you consider a good tan to be the back of your neck and the left arm… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your biggest ambition in life is to git that big ole coon. The one what hangs… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your wife wants to stop at the gas station to see if they've got the new… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you've ever stared at a can of orange juice because it said concentrate. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you can amuse yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you use a radiator hose to fix your kitchen sink. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if The Salvation Army declines your mattress. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your handkerchief doubles as your shirt sleeve. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your vehicle has a two-tone paint job - primer red and primer gray. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If the gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot, you might be a redneck. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your beer can collection is considered a tourist attraction in your home town. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police! — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet 'Ms. Right — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you think Silence of the Lambs is what happens when Larry walks out to the barn. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just misunderstood. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if you consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if on your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging. — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
