I would like to be known as someone who was really sweet but also knowledgeable in all areas of life. — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
I would be an actress for the rest of my life just because it's really relaxing. Writing is hard work, and stand-up… — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
Animals in general have sparked a weird depression in me, because as much as I tried, I couldn't layer a personality over… — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
I thought I would either be an epidemiologist or a 'Price Is Right' model. — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
I would love for people to know that the label 'feminist' is something that everyone should wear proudly, because it just means… — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
I would never bring a kid to a comedy show myself, but I have noticed that I can't stop other people from… — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
If you were to send a werewolf to the moon, would he be a werewolf permanently? — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
I used to go to open mics in New York when I was starting out, and it was mostly just people who wanted an… — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
I used to carry a rabbit's foot for luck. Then it was a monkey's paw. Now it's a camel's toe. — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
I don't enjoy reality television at all. I have to say that I get it, though. I watch some of it, and I understand… — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
I think I've always had a disconnect from what I'm supposed to be like. — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
If I'm having a fancy glass of champagne, I'll always mix it with the champagne of beers. Because I deserve all the champagnes. — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
Guys. If your pants are below your ass you have no right to accuse any lady of dressing slutty. — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
The first time I was on TV, on "Flight of the Conchords," someone put up a YouTube clip and said, 'You're too ugly to… — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
You go from nobody looking at you to people taking second looks. I remember really loving it - and then feeling so guilty for… — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
1st Valentine's Day: 200,000 BC men and women congregate on opposite sides of Pangaea, waiting for someone to make the first move. — Kristen Schaal Copy Share Image
