As a young child I had Santa and Jesus all mixed up. I could identify Coke or Pepsi with just one sip,… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
My window fogs and this makes me feel like there is no world outside of the car. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
Most of us have love in our lives. Most of us love other people are are ourselves loved by others. But make… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
When you say, "I need more confidence," what you're really saying is, "I need those people over there to approve of me."… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
And I hope she does not live in a dark world. Because even the most terrible loss doesn't have to make you… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
The truth is humbling, terrifying, and often exhilarating. It blows the doors off the hinges and fills the world with fresh air. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
Smoking had become my favorite thing in the world to do. It was like having instant comfort, no matter where or when. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
There is nothing about myself that I wouldn't reveal or write about. I don't care how horrendous or ridiculous I may appear in person… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
Like every child, I adored her. Until I formed a brain and got to know her. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
“You must hang onto the scraps of the bucking moment as if your sanity and life depended on it - because actually they do.” — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
Real optimism is not the pep talk you give yourself. It is earned through the labor involved in emotional housekeeping. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
If you hate your life, you haven't' seen enough of it. If you hate your life, it's because your life is too small and… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
I think writers tend to be experience junkies, and I think they also tend to want to be on the outside looking in. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
I think part of the reason I'm attracted to Foster is because he's such a mess. I mean, the people I have loved in… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
“On typical days, (dust) is simply irritating. On Roid Rage days, it made me want to stomp down to the highway, pull drivers out… — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
I'm like the guy who prepares your taxes or a dentist. I'm very conservative and boring in a lot of ways. — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
“Nothing surprises me now," I tell him. I am stoic. I am Joan of Arc, with liver damage and an unused penis.” — Augusten Burroughs Copy Share Image
