Turd Quotes

“There ain’t no clean end on a turd,”

— Marc Cameron

“You look as if you have bitten into a turd.”

— Norman Spinrad

“Life is short. Don't be a turd.”

— Dan Pearce

“She's about as sweet as a flaming turd.”

— James Patterson

“Gonna be a real frog-strangling turd-floater.”

— Charles Martin

Nobody makes a turd like that and lives.

— Mike Rowe

“Like they say, no point in rubbin' a turd.”

— Julia Wertz

Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.

— Anonymous

“I’m trying to put things in the best light, but a turd’s a turd, whatever light it’s in!”

— Joe Abercrombie

“Even if it's a witty, singing and dancing turd, it's still a turd.”

— Stephen King

If you don't have a mobile strategy, you're in deep turd.

— Jen-Hsun Huang

To tell you the truth you are a giant whale turd... inside joke 5

— Candie

“He's the meanest one. We call him..Byrd the Turd”

— Marthe Jocelyn

“I just let it roll. Like a hot turd down a hill.”

— Charles Bukowski

What are you turd burgers talking about? Dressing for comfort? -Fat Amy

— Pitch Perfect

Jerry Bruckheimer creates comedy, he just doesn't realize because he's a turd.

— Trey Parker

“Believe me, Athelstan, you can wrap a dog's turd in a cloth of gold but it remains a dog's turd.”

— Paul Doherty

“You could rub a dry turd with a whole can of linseed oil, after all, and all you'd end up with was…

— Bruce Machart

“Miss Green can call a turd a rose if she wants, but that don't mean people's going to be lining up to…

— K. Martin Beckner

I'm not afraid to play ugly - look at 'Adaptation.' I looked like a turd that a cat had coughed up.

— Nicolas Cage

The trouble with most coaches is that they start with the assumption that everybody is a turd. And that ain't right.

— Bum Phillips

“Do you have any idea how many times I’ve wanted to turn you into a turd and flush you down the toilet?”

— Quinn Loftis

Javier Pastore wouldn't get a beach ball off me if we were locked in a phone box. He's turd. Anyone who thinks…

— Joey Barton

Man I tell what, I felt like A one legged cat try'in to burry turd's on A frozen pond out there. -Tom…

— Beavis And Butthead

“Everyone had taken their places, when I excused myself to visit the bathroom, and there, in the toilet, was the absolute biggest…

— David Sedaris

“Ah … politics, Sergeant. When the top brass hand you a turd, you polish it and say, “my, what a lovely jobbie!”…

— Stuart MacBride

Watching these channels all day is incredibly depressing. I live in a constant state of depression. I think of us as turd…

— Jon Stewart

“They eat the sewage that floats on the surface of the mass culture, digest it, and then get creative diarrhea--all at once.…

— John Varley

“Sir Gerald Moore: I was at dinner last evening, and halfway through the pudding, this four-year-old child came alone, dragging a little…

— Tom Wolfe

You're like a turd that won't flush.

— Dennis Hopper

You can't polish a turd.

— Anonymous

I live in a 9 million dollar turd.

— Ozzy Osbourne

If it's not working, you can't polish a turd.

— Lee Unkrich

You can't change a turd into gold.

— The Ramones

Childbirth is no more a miracle then eating food and a turd coming out of your ass.

— Bill Hicks

“That food was so bad I can't wait for it to become a turd and leave me.”

— Thomas McGuane

I always say to my religious friends, if a pool had even one turd in it, would you jump in?

— Bill Maher

Trying to understand some people ls like trying to pick up a turd by the clean end

— Anonymous

“You are but a hard turd in the ass of my journey.”

— David Liss

“You don't have to eat the entire turd to know that it's not a crab cake.”

— Orson Scott Card