There once was an umpire whose vision Was cause for abuse and derision He remarked in surprise, 'Why pick on my eyes? It's my heart that dictates my decision.' — Ogden Nash Copy Share Image
There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at… — Ogden Nash Copy Share Image
The sky is now indelible ink, The branches reft asunder; But you and I we do not shrink; We love the lovely thunder. — Ogden Nash Copy Share Image
“Love is a word that is constantly heard, Hate is a word that is not. Love, I am told, is more precious that gold.… — Ogden Nash Copy Share Image
A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips… — Ogden Nash Copy Share Image
Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them. — Ogden Nash Copy Share Image
“Senescence begins And middle-age ends The day your descendants Outnumber your friends” — Ogden Nash Copy Share Image
I don't mind their having a lot of money, and I don't care how they employ it, but I do think that they damn… — Ogden Nash Copy Share Image
To maintain your marriage brimming, with really like in the wedding cup, anytime you are incorrect, admit it each time you're proper, shut up. — Ogden Nash Copy Share Image
