“If you know how to open doors with just a smile, you must need your teeth capped every six months” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Falling in love means your reserve chute didn't work as you hurtled back to earth” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“The only difference between me and a madman is that he has the certification” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Love is the canvas covering the furniture that you've become a part of” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Don't you wish we all lived in black light.... for one thing, it would mean an end to toothpaste as we know… — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“If it's the thought that counts, then ignorance must use a calculator” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“If you love somebody set them free- it also works equally well if you hate somebody” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“When you're out in the wilderness and get back to base camp only to discover sleeping bag turndown service….that's no chocolate on… — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“I wanted to marry the first girl that I fell in love with, but there were religious differences. I was an agnostic… — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Come Hell or High Water" usually depends on the kind of plug you use in the bath tub” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Love is just the chocolate-coated realization you're going to spend the rest of your life with a person and unfortunately it melts… — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Some people drip wax on themselves like a human chianti bottle to see if they feel anything….but getting a wicker basket to… — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Camus said 'Love Lasts or Love Burns'. I want a Lasting Burn-just nothing requiring a series of painful treatments by a rubber-gloved… — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Behind every great man is a great woman' but in front of every great man should be a spectacular woman” — josh stern Copy Share Image
“It's not hard to fail...it's hard to accept you failed...but once that's out of the way, it's pretty smooth sailing” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the blame” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“Not only will those ultra bright European sulphur diode high beams ' catch a deer in the headlights' they'll vaporize it too” — josh stern Copy Share Image
“You're only given as much as you can handle, before going back for seconds” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“It's not that I'm ahead of my time, it's more that the world is running late” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“As for Chicks with Daddy Issues: Do I really want to be with a Woman who wants to be my Father?” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
“The practice of doing more than necessary works best when packing lunch boxes” — Josh Stern Copy Share Image
