The poor kid passes it to the Jew, the Jew shoots. He misses! Proving once and for all that Jews cannot play hockey! — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
Alright. Look. I didnt want to have to say this, but I think maybe were not seeing heaven because one of us doesnt believe… — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
Ive learned something, too: selling out is sweet because when you sell out, you get to make a lot of money, and when you… — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
I would never let a woman kick my ass. If she tried something, Id be like, HEY! You get your bitch ass back in… — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
Its a mans obligation to stick his boneration in a womens separation; this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation. — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
If some girl tried to kick my ass, Id be like, Hey. Why dont you stop dressing me like a mailman uh, and making… — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
No, they dont, you jealous weakling. Passing Man: God damn, thats a big fat ass. — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
Hippies.Theyre everywhere. They wanna save the earth, but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad. — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
Well, Ive been lickin this carpet for 3 whole hours and I dont feel like a lesbian. — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
Handle it? For two billion dollars I could handle my Grandpas balls dude. — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
You so much as TOUCH kittys ass, and Ill put a firecracker in your nutsack and blow your balls all over your pants. — Eric Cartman Copy Share Image
