How much does it cost to entice a dope-smoking UNIX system guru to Dayton? — Brian Boyle Copy Share Image
“He will work off his crudities in time. I rather mistrust young men who slip into life gracefully.” — E. M. Forster Copy Share Image
We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Getting married is like trading in the adoration of many for the sarcasm of one. — Mae West Copy Share Image
“One should never marry a man who doesn't own a decent set of scissors.” — Gillian Flynn Copy Share Image
The house was as empty as a beer closet in premises where painters have been at work. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The only possible conclusion the social sciences can draw is: some do, some don't. — Ernest Rutherford Copy Share Image
You know, my main reaction to this money thing is that it's humorous, all the attention to it, because it's hardly the… — Steve Jobs Copy Share Image
I wasn't really that informed about the two-year-old. Oh, I'd read about them, and occasionally I'd see documentaries on the Discovery Channel… — Ray Romano Copy Share Image
The telephone is the greatest single enemy of scholarship; for what our intellectual forebears used to inscribe in ink now goes once… — Stephen Jay Gould Copy Share Image
“This was shaping up to be the worst conference call of my life, even worse than that time I accidentally clogged the… — Rick Gualtieri Copy Share Image
I'm a very jovial guy. I like to laugh, and when things strike me as funny, I don't hide the fact that… — Michael Rooker Copy Share Image
[They let] friendship with the leaders in China obscure our devotion to freedom and democracy when those kids set up in Tiananmen… — William J. Clinton Copy Share Image
Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
The proverbial Englishman, we know from old chronicler Froissart, takes his pleasures sadly, and the Englishwoman goes a step further and takes… — Jerome K. Jerome Copy Share Image
“It seems - and who so astonished as they? - that they had held back material facts; that they were guilty of… — Rudyard Kipling Copy Share Image
One night in Tokyo we watched two Japanese businessmen saying good-night to each other after what had clearly been a long night… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
First, there was Confucius. Then, the sayings of Chairman Mao. And now the pithy, ironic, and humorous insights of Ai Weiwei. I… — Jerome A. Cohen Copy Share Image
God has intended the great to be great and the little to be little ... The trade unions, under the European system,… — Henry Ward Beecher Copy Share Image
Goresthorpe Grange is a feudal mansion - or so it was termed in the advertisement which originally brought it under my notice.… — Arthur Conan Doyle Copy Share Image
“What did Finnick Odair want?” he asks. I turn and put my lips close to Peeta's and drop my eyelids in imitation… — Suzanne Collins Copy Share Image
I compare a lot of life to looking at a map through a straw. The less ability you have to see life… — Reggie Watts Copy Share Image
Next," said Mrs Wilfer with a wave of her gloves, expressive of abdication under protest from the culinary throne, "I would recommend… — Charles Dickens Copy Share Image