“...besides, i'm a cat. i respect the sanctity of sleep.” — serpent's shadow Rick Riordan Copy Share Image
And ah for a man to arise in me, That the man I am may cease to be! — Alfred Lord Tennyson Copy Share Image
Holographic Strip club. You can look but you can't touch. — Stanley Victor Paskavich Copy Share Image
“This day had officially punched every hole in her crazy ticket.” — Kimberly Kincaid Copy Share Image
Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase? — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
“Being bigheaded can be as irritating and as dangerous as being small-minded.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
The edge of inappropriate is the spiritual home of the best stand-up comedy. — Frank Skinner Copy Share Image
So I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode. I said "Are you two an… — Tommy Cooper Copy Share Image
My father tried to give me the sex talk once, and he chickened out. He walked into my room and went, 'Adam… — Adam Ferrara Copy Share Image
The humor section is the last place an author wants to be. They put your stuff next to collections of Cathy cartoons. — David Sedaris Copy Share Image
“The prettier the wine bottle, the higher the likelihood sorority girls will buy it.” — Lauren Leto Copy Share Image
A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Laughter or crying is what a human being does when there's nothing else he can do. — Kurt Vonnegut Copy Share Image
“How do you know you're a girl? I'm wearing a frock. And if you take it off? I get cold, so I… — Ivor Cutler Copy Share Image
“Sometimes it seems that for nineteenth-century Russian writers, food was what landscape (or maybe class?) was for the English. Or war for… — Anya von Bremzen Copy Share Image
“If I have multiple personalities will I taste better to a zombie, or is the effort simply wasted? I've talked it over… — Neil Leckman Copy Share Image
“There was polite laughter in the courtroom. Bosch noticed that the attorneys -- prosecution and defense -- dutifully joined in, a couple… — Michael Connelly Copy Share Image
My favorite kinds of comedies are ones that hopefully make you laugh a lot, but ultimately make you care about something in… — Jason H. Moore Copy Share Image
“Viagra isn't the only drug being prescribed off-label for women with arousal problems. Los Angeles urologist Jennifer Berman told me some doctors… — Mary Roach Copy Share Image
Everyone's always interested in a dark theme, especially when there's humor connected to it. It seems like that helps, if that's an… — Robert De Niro Copy Share Image
“I could flay you and wear your skin as a cloak, and caper in the streets in the moonlight. But some might… — Charlie Huston Copy Share Image
I believe in physical comedy, because that reaches out most to people. — Norman Wisdom Copy Share Image
