I haven't had sex in so long I am considering becoming a born again virgin. — Ryan Swain Copy Share Image
“NOTHING HAS EVER LOOKED LIKE THAT EVER IN ALL OF HUMAN HISTORY,” he said. His enthusiasm was adorable. I couldn’t resist leaning… — John Green Copy Share Image
Those jeans are comfortable, and for those of you who want your president to look great in his tight jeans, I'm sorry… — Barack Obama Copy Share Image
Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. Theres too much fraternizing with the enemy. — Henry Kissinger Copy Share Image
“In order to keep your head about you and apply the teachings of the Aincrad style, it was essential to keep its… — Reki Kawahara Copy Share Image
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target — Ashleigh Brilliant Copy Share Image
“Damn it! I knew she was a monster! John! Amy! Listen! Guard your buttholes.” — David Wong Copy Share Image
Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong. -T-Shirt — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
“The lengths to which you’re prepared to go to please a housekeeper make me wonder about the servant situation in Scotland. Good… — Elizabeth Hoyt Copy Share Image
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA! OMG! I can't even... xD :D They think of everything! LOL — Anonymous Copy Share Image
How in the world are you ever going to meet the person you love if you dont love going out in the… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“(…) Trying to think of how to take the least crowded ways to class, so the least amount of people will stare… — Keary Taylor Copy Share Image
“Well," Cinder finally grumbled. "I guess that was pretty fast thinking." A relieved grin filled up Thorne's face. "We're having another moment,… — Marissa Meyer Copy Share Image
Thinking about the first person ever to get drunk. People must have been like, COME QUICK! JEREMIAH HAS BEEN STRICKEN WITH AWESOME! — Kendrick Cole Copy Share Image
I think women dress for other women to let them know what their deal is. Because if women were only dressing for… — Tina Fey Copy Share Image
“My father was incredibly indecisive. As an example, take his wedding day. He couldn't decide where to sit in the getaway car,… — John Bennardo Copy Share Image
I loved 'Pulling.' It was so original and hilarious. I remember being very sad when it finished. I'd love to start a… — Sophie McShera Copy Share Image
If you're a kid who was not especially a star in your high school, I recommend going to a college in the… — Mindy Kaling Copy Share Image
If it's sent by ship then it's a cargo, if it's sent by road then it's a shipment. — Dave Allen Copy Share Image
Bryant Gumbel's ego has applied for statehood. And if it's accepted, it will be the fifth-largest. — Willard Scott Copy Share Image
“Most priests wish they were as righteous as they seem to most members of their congregations.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
