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Before I help you up when you fall down I will laugh at you so hard it will hurt, when we watch… — Lynn M Copy Share Image
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Y'all should be happy for me. It's funny, compared to my peers, my catalog isn't even that big, but I'm still getting… — Saweetie Copy Share Image
I think the most important thing journalism taught me is to mine for details. The details are key. You can't try to… — Karen Abbott Copy Share Image
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Advice of the Day: Sometimes you have to try not to care, no matter how much you do because sometimes you mean… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Fuck," Ranger said. Ranger didn't often curse and he rarely raised his voice. The fuck has been entirely conversational. Like he was… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
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*Types in password* Incorrect password *Types in password again* Incorrect password ARE U FRIGGIN KIDDING ME THAT IS MY¦.-Oh..Caps Lock. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
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When your parents ask you why you're smiling while reading a text and you're just like 'CAN'T I JUST BE HAPPY?!' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
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“I don’t want to talk about it,” she said. Once again he was close. Too close. So damn close. “At all,” she… — Jill Shalvis Copy Share Image
Better a loving single-parent family than a 'conventional' family where the parents hate each other and the father is a demagogue. — Moby Copy Share Image
Good girls own only one credit card & rarely use Bad girls own only one bra & rarely use Naughty girls own… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“Late twenties, single, female. Do the math. Flirty flings were fabulous until you hit the big three-O, all downhill from there. Biological… — Nicola Marsh Copy Share Image
[when asked by his secretary if she should destroy all files that were over ten years old] Yes, but keep copies. — Samuel Goldwyn Copy Share Image
I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
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Voyeurism, watching people go about their daily lives, is universally funny, no matter the culture, no matter the anything, it's just always… — James Murray Copy Share Image
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Ritesh Deshmukh is rock star. He has a lovely family. He works so hard, and he's a great actor. He's funny, friendly,… — Nargis Fakhri Copy Share Image
That annoying moment when you just want to listen to music but someone wants to constantly speak to you, making you pause… — Emanuel Sebastiao Copy Share Image
It's funny, because I was trained as a dramatic actor at New York's Colonnades Theater Lab in the '70s, along with Jeff… — Peter Scolari Copy Share Image
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Things have been invented because of alcohol. Like the taser, okay? Yeah! The morning after pill, okay? The reach-around. Judge Judy. What… — Dave Attell Copy Share Image
I have more respect for somebody who's like, 'Yeah I like to party, so screw off,' then for Tara , who talks… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
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