Do not crush the flowers of wisdom with the hobnail boots of cynicism. — Bill Bailey Copy Share Image
Not everyone is going to like you and you are not going to like everyone. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Ofcourse gay men dress well... They didn't spend all that time in the closet doing nothing — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When I have a daughter, I shall name her Stacy. So I will be Stacy's mom thats got it goin' on. :) — Anonymous Copy Share Image
What's really funny about being National Youth Poet Laureate is that not everyone even knows it exists. — Amanda Gorman Copy Share Image
Ladies have come up with all these expressions to reassure men. "Oh, honey, it's not the size of the ship, it's the… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
I had it just Lil Nas at first because every rapper has a 'lil' in front of his name, and that's funny… — Lil Nas X Copy Share Image
“What would a pie chart of your malicious to non-malicious thoughts look like? How big a piece of the pie is non-malicious?” — Emma Mills Copy Share Image
I want to do everything, so when I started I wanted to be an actress, and I've always written funny things. I… — Ellie Taylor Copy Share Image
Dear math worksheet, Please don't have a back, please don't have...Awe shit, theres a back. Sincerely, fuck you I have better things… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The awkward moment when you're taking a bite of pizza, & you accidentally bite the whole entire layer of cheese off. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“This was going to be the best cup of tea ever, even if it did look piss weak and oily. He took… — Simon Dunn Copy Share Image
“To die famous is the goal of the immortal. To die young is the goal of the healthy. To die memorably is… — Bauvard Copy Share Image
