I'd like to pretend that I've never seen anything, never read anything, never heard anything... and then make something... — Keith Haring Copy Share Image
“I was one of those. I meddled with dark powers. I summoned demons. I ate the entire little cheese, including the rind.” — Patrick Rothfuss Copy Share Image
I thought I was going crazy. So I went to a therapist. After half an hour, he paid me to leave. I… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Wouldn't it be great, if there was a one-stop shop where funny people could take their ideas and have them made? — Lenny Henry Copy Share Image
“So that's it?" Kenji says. "You just like him for his personality, huh?" "What?" "All of this," Kenji says, waving a hand… — Tahereh Mafi Copy Share Image
“He wasn't aware of it but when he smiled he looked like an amiable bear. When he didn't smile he didn't look… — Emma Goldrick Copy Share Image
“I was obligated to be nice. I couldn’t be the one Canadian who ruined the country’s reputation. How could I live with… — Steven Barker Copy Share Image
Strength is the ability to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands - and then eat just one… — Judith Viorst Copy Share Image
Latinos, Asians, African-Americans, women - we're all trying to find our place in this world of cinema and television and theater. And… — Sandra Bullock Copy Share Image
Faith never knows where it is being led, or it would not be faith. True faith is content to travel under sealed… — J. Oswald Sanders Copy Share Image
Even for natives, French satire is rarely laugh-out-loud funny. Its unspoken punch line is typically that things have gone irrevocably wrong, and… — Pamela Druckerman Copy Share Image
To make it stand, you wet it. To make it wet, you suck it. To make it stiff, you lick it. To… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
You can't teach a person to be funny unless you teach him how to swipe someone else's material. To be a success… — Soupy Sales Copy Share Image
My mum passing away wasn't funny, but that funeral and what I went through, the things that happened, looking back at it,… — Kevin Hart Copy Share Image
For Every0ne Here... Please Don't Lie So much...Untill Unless your Girlfriend is Rihanna N Boyfriend is Eminem, they're not gonna love the… — Raghav Singh Copy Share Image
I grew up in the age of radio where we just went wherever the jobs were available. The job doing afternoons at… — Elvis Duran Copy Share Image
If the physical thing you're doing is funny, you don't have to act funny while doing it...Just be real and it will… — Gene Wilder Copy Share Image
You try your hardest to raise your teenagers with patience, honesty and good manners, but they still end up being like you… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
She paints her nails and she don't know He's got her best friend on the phone She'll wash her hair, his dirty… — American Hi Fi Copy Share Image
Funny enough, I don't really recall being read kids' books as a child. I think my truly favorite thing to do was… — Julio Torres Copy Share Image
I find it really funny that men can always get away with being a ladies man. Everyone thinks it's really cool. But… — Jade Thirlwall Copy Share Image
Dear Amber Hope,You're amazing, Funny, creative, and yet soooo pretty xD Don't let anyone I mean ANYONE tell you different! 'Cause they… — Jasmine Copy Share Image
You wanna hear something funny? There was a man who was drowning, and a boat came, and the man on the boat… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I don’t think I want to visit your house anymore.” “Sometimes neither do I.” “And your grandfather….” “Leave my Papaw alone.” “He’s… — Nick Wilgus Copy Share Image
When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who werent smart enough to get… — SangFroid Stalker Copy Share Image
“Girls, on the other hand, have always come easy. I don't know why that is, exactly. Maybe it's the outsider vibe and… — Kendare Blake Copy Share Image
“Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the… — Russell Beland Copy Share Image
I like baked potatoes. I don't have a microwave oven, and it takes forever to bake a potato in a conventional oven.… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
“give me your cell phone" "What for?" "So i could admire the fine technology a human woman can afford to buy." He… — Jennifer Ashley Copy Share Image
The worst question people can ask me is, 'How would I describe my brand of comedy?' I just go, 'Funny.' I like… — Michelle Buteau Copy Share Image
“Way I figure it, if I'm forced to have a partner, might as well have one with benefits. If you're annoying me,… — S.E. Jakes Copy Share Image
It's funny to look back - Tessa was seven and I was nine. I remember there wasn't a lot of talking at… — Scott Moir Copy Share Image
“It was like watching an angsty hormone-fueled train wreck and firmly cemented my resolve to be at least twenty-five before I considered… — Stacey Jay Copy Share Image
Family is funny, and so it was not an unnatural thing for me, growing up, not to know anything about my dad… — Courtney B. Vance Copy Share Image
The first song I wrote was called 'Baby Darling Darling Girl,' and you know what's funny? It went, 'Baby darling darling girl,… — Nate Dogg Copy Share Image
“Growing up, my guardians refused to tell me what horny meant. As I got a little older, they forbid me to use… — Ella Dominguez Copy Share Image
This is an especially good time for you vacationers who plan to fly, because the Reagan administration, as part of the same… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
A friend is 1% funny, 2% sweet, 3% caring, 4% loving, 90% good looking. Thats why I am your friend! You are so lucky. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's funny to think of Dave Chappelle's show and how popular it was and he was before YouTube. I would imagine 'Chappelle's… — Paul Scheer Copy Share Image
“The least we each ought to do for someone who treats us like a king or a queen is to treat them… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
