Well, I hope before Glenn goes, he'll come up here so we can give him a big hug and a kiss, because… — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
Our fan of the week is... Daisy Alejandra! Congratulations í. To get picked as our next fan of the week, post on… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“The more you talk about it, rehash it, rethink it, cross analyze it, debate it, respond to it, get paranoid about it,… — Shannon L. Alder Copy Share Image
'Playing House' works because we're being supremely honest to what we think is funny and not what we think other people think… — Lennon Parham Copy Share Image
“Am I higher or lower than she? It was always the vital question for Anna: who was superior, and how she could… — Laura L. Sullivan Copy Share Image
I thought to myself, 'why not write a bestseller?' In the first place, more people buy them and more people read them.… — George Burns Copy Share Image
“And there is one disconcerting thing about working with a computer – it's likely to talk back to you. You make some… — John Drury Clark Copy Share Image
The first testicular gaurd, the *Cup*, was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means… — Harriet Morgan Copy Share Image
Where so many hours have been spent in convincing myself that I am right, is there not some reason to fear I… — Jane Austen Copy Share Image
“Matias frowned. Damn, he’d had a vision of this gorgeous woman naked? He hadn’t thought he could despise his memory loss any… — Jane Cousins Copy Share Image
“In some cases, you can tell how somebody is being treated by their own boss from the way they are treating someone… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
There is so much more than that little space from 14 to 40. And if you cut that off and begin to… — Rene Russo Copy Share Image
A girl only needs three things in her life: love to make her weak, alcohol to make her strong, and friends to… — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
There are many things that are perfectly legitimate, but if you are going to concentrate on God you cannot do them. — Oswald Chambers Copy Share Image
They say women love surprises but come out from under her bed yelling surprise! & you get arrested & sent to prison. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
“Oh. My. God.’ she said, pointing out of the window. ‘Do you know what that is?’ I nodded and said, ‘I think… — Frank Cottrell Boyce Copy Share Image
The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working when you get up in the morning, and doesn't stop until you get… — Robert Frost Copy Share Image
You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look that says, 'My God, you're… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I loved playing Sweetie in 'Mubarakan.' It was chaotic and funny; it was sort of a magnum unfold in a chaotic way. — Ileana D'Cruz Copy Share Image
Skeptic that I was as an adolescent, I had recently come to believe in a Supreme Being after thumbing through a Victoria's… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“I got mixed up with some oddness in my youth, and the long and short of it is that I can't shuffle… — Jasper Fforde Copy Share Image
I'm sorry, was that homophobic? No--I think it was, 'cause I hear that a lot. Dave, What?, You're talking about being gay.… — Dave Attell Copy Share Image
Cheech and I used to call ourselves musicians; we never called ourselves comedians. We were musicians that were funny. — Tommy Chong Copy Share Image
Most kids: I like to drink and smoke weed. Me: When it's cold out I like to breathe heavily and pretend I… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You can always win an argument with a lady during your last few minutes of your life by telling her that she's… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“We’re adults. I might be a little more of an adult if you’re counting years but I bet I have a lower… — Robyn Carr Copy Share Image
I like to be able to feel as many parts of myself while watching a movie at one time. I think that's… — James Gunn Copy Share Image
“From: Beth Fremont To: Jennifer Scribner-Snyder Sent: Thurs, 09/30/1999 3:42 PM Subject: If you were Superman … … and you could choose… — Rainbow Rowell Copy Share Image
You know, the funny thing about awards - some people are, like, 'Well, it does validate the quality of the work or… — Jamie Hector Copy Share Image
People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up… — Bill Watterson Copy Share Image
Watching football is like watching pornography. There's plenty of action, and I can't take my eyes off it, but when it's over,… — Luke Salisbury Copy Share Image
I'd love to get into some comedy, but people keep saying, 'You're not funny!' And I say, 'Well, fair enough.' I have… — Ciaran Hinds Copy Share Image
“Gone are the days when the old country doctor would drive out to your house and amputate your infected leg for a… — Cuthbert Soup Copy Share Image
That funny moment when sneeze so hard it makes you fart and when people look at you funny, you look at your… — Evan Ceaser Copy Share Image
“She oozes the kind of over-confidence that only comes to people who wear deep red lipstick and sparkly tissue sarees in bright… — Aditi Mathur Kumar Copy Share Image
In show business, it takes 10 years to create an overnight success. You've heard that, right? But what you don't hear is… — Marc Maron Copy Share Image
Car accidents usually result from one person being in too great a hurry and the other not being in a hurry at… — Vikrant Parsai Copy Share Image
I realized I was gay in the shower one day with Barbra Streisand. It happened while I was lathering, rinsing, and repeating… — Ross Mathews Copy Share Image
The key to doing 'Harold and Kumar' movies is you make it earnest. Primarily what we do is make Harold and Kumar's… — John Cho Copy Share Image
There's a phrase we live by in America: "In God We Trust". It's right there where Jesus would want it: on our… — Bill Maher Copy Share Image
