Explanation changes whatever is explained into something explainable. — Wendell Berry Copy Share Image
Edmonton is not the end of the world but you can certainly see it from there. — Mordecai Richler Copy Share Image
I wasn't always black... there was this freckle, and it got bigger and bigger. — Bill Cosby Copy Share Image
Starbucks acts like they're so fancy. You sell hot black water and muffins. Calm down. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
There is nothing that Nature seems to have inclined us to as much as society. — Niccolo Machiavelli Copy Share Image
Be awfully nice to them going up, because you're gonna meet them all coming down. — Jimmy Durante Copy Share Image
The three toughest fighters I ever fought were Sugar Ray Robinson, Sugar Ray Robinson and Sugar Ray Robinson. I fought Sugar so… — Jake LaMotta Copy Share Image
The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
[On what bugged him] A fine city with too many socialists and mosquitoes. At least you can spray the mosquitoes. — Ralph Klein Copy Share Image
If you look at comparative figures, the last two episodes of 'Six Wives of Henry VIII' were watched by 4m. Graham Norton,… — David Starkey Copy Share Image
I've toured around the world. I've worked with men, women. I feel like I've been unusually lucky to have supportive friends around… — Tig Notaro Copy Share Image
Sati is hilarious all the time. She has a great sense of humor. She knows she's funny, too. Like whenever she does… — Alyson Hannigan Copy Share Image
So I went down my local ice-cream shop, and said 'I want to buy an ice-cream'. He said Hundreds & thousands?' I… — Tim Vine Copy Share Image
One day I asked my heart - What is Love? Heart Replied - See don't ask me Questions which are out of… — Raghav Singh Copy Share Image
“Love is a banana. First you peel it, and then you roll on the condom. ” — Dark Jar Tin Zoo Copy Share Image
It's Friday and I'm ready to swing. Pick up my girls and hit the party scene. — Aaliyah Copy Share Image
If you have to release bad news to the public, it would help if you are not ugly. — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
I'd dress up as Siri for Halloween if my life didn't already entail being asked stupid questions all day. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's hard to keep on being civil when they ask you such annoying questions. — Olivia de Havilland Copy Share Image
Larry Lintz steals second standing up. He slid, but he didn't have to. — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
When he is without money, his wife becomes secretary; When he has money, his secretary becomes wife. Man O Man! — Irfan Khan Copy Share Image
“Boy, you knock on the devil's door and he will head-slam you through the wall." -Dev” — Sherrilyn Kenyon Copy Share Image
I don't always tweet when I'm drunk, but when I do, it's when I'm visiting my family. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Bitch you're as stupid as the kid who prank called me the other day and forgot to put their number on private.. — Zendy Copy Share Image
Someone told me I had funny facial expressions. I don't know whether I take that as a compliment or not, but. — Lucy Punch Copy Share Image
Ou don't realize how easy this game is until you get up in that broadcasting booth. — Mickey Mantle Copy Share Image
The work has created man, but neither laziness did not kill anybody. — MXLOVINNN MI BABII SPYDERRR Copy Share Image
“There's nothing quite as funny as someone else's misery - Cassel Sharpe” — Holly Black Copy Share Image