How are u in beauty school and still ugly as shit? WTF are u studying? — Derick Menendez Copy Share Image
I'm just not one of those naturally funny, relaxed actors who enjoy the spotlight and are so good at it. — Heath Ledger Copy Share Image
We lived our lives as if life was forever. To live one's life without a sense of time is to squander it. — Diana Trilling Copy Share Image
Golf seems to me an arduous way to go for a walk. I prefer to take the dogs out. — Anne, Princess Royal Copy Share Image
Associate reverently, and as much as you can, with your loftiest thoughts. — Henry David Thoreau Copy Share Image
If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all. And if you do have to say it, make… — Sabrina Carpenter Copy Share Image
People tend to think I'm funny and fluffy, but I can switch on a sixpence from extreme happiness to utter despair. I'm… — Miriam Margolyes Copy Share Image
“Shepley stomped into the apartment and slammed the door behind him. “She’s fucking impossible!” I kissed Travis on the cheek. “That’s my… — Jamie McGuire Copy Share Image
I did not intend to write a funny book, at first. I did not know I was a humorist. I have never… — Jerome K. Jerome Copy Share Image
How about those Olympics, ladies and gentlemen. Didn't London look like the place to be? New York City was in the running… — David Letterman Copy Share Image
Steven Alan Green is ONE funny writer ---- Everything I read of yours makes me laugh and think - Not just the… — Taylor Negron Copy Share Image
I personally like Kolarov. He is one of the funniest players I have played with. Every day, he has something new, and… — Fernandinho Copy Share Image
“I saved you,” Andersen said at last, slowly but firmly, like Pat was an idiot child who had to be reminded of… — Alex Gabriel Copy Share Image
Instead of said following me on twitter it should be stalk me on twitter. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Sending a risky text & thinking..Oh god, they hate me, if they don't respond within 30 seconds. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I have been governor every now and then, but I am a forester all the time. — Gifford Pinchot Copy Share Image
Tomorrow I'll wake up at 5am. Mom - Lol Dad - Lol Neighbours - Lol Friends - Lol Aliens - Lol — Manish Bhagtani Copy Share Image
What is so fascinating about sitting around watching a bunch of pituitary cases stuff a ball through a hoop? — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you went to kiss your GALFRND, and She burped right in your mouth… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Each and every one of us is a leader. Some of us just don't know it yet. — Umair Haque Copy Share Image
Ron Howard is just a funny legacy director. As a film nerd, he's kind of a funny person to valorize. — John Wilson Copy Share Image
There is nothing at all wrong with having money unless money has you. — Norman Vincent Peale Copy Share Image
I'm pretty sure my grandmom watches over me whenever I masturbate. The sound of that walker is so unbearable. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to? — Bette Midler Copy Share Image
You got a problem with me? Well you can take that up with my older brother. I'm SURE he'll fix the problem ;) — Rayy Copy Share Image
We shall be judged by what we do, not by how we felt while we were doing it. — Kenneth Tynan Copy Share Image
I really lived life to its fullest and that got me in trouble from time to time. — Matthew Perry Copy Share Image
A Man's penis is so polite. It stands up so girls have a place to sit down. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Don't be afraid of opposition. Remember, a kite rises against, not with, the wind. — Hamilton Wright Mabie Copy Share Image
We have now armed to such an extent as the world has never before seen. — Adolf Hitler Copy Share Image
