“I'm sure this is a diversionary ploy. But that doesn't mean it isn't real." -Abe Sapien” — John Arcudi Copy Share Image
The number one rule of comedy acting is 'don't try to be funny.' Act as seriously as possible. — Daniel J. Goor Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw that you cared, and I wanted to be everything that I could be. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
We are ashamed of our thoughts and often see them brought forth by others. — Ralph Waldo Emerson Copy Share Image
I think the whole concept that women aren't funny is dead. It's over; it's done. — Kate Flannery Copy Share Image
Yesterday, at a restaurant, I asked the waiter how he prepared the chicken. He replied, "We don't...we just tell it straight that… — Mahesh Shroff Copy Share Image
“I decided to do the easy task of changing situations and conditions by being a hero, than staying back to do the… — Amit Kalantri Copy Share Image
Age: that period of life in which we compound for the vices that we still cherish by reviling those that we no… — Ambrose Bierce Copy Share Image
I dont care what people say...its funny how they think their opinion would even matter to me...i am very comfortable in my… — Alexia Copy Share Image
“The boys exchanged uneasy glances. It was their first experience with the inexorable logic of women, which is overwhelming even, or perhaps… — John Steinbeck Copy Share Image
Laughing is one of the best exercises, it's like running inside your mind. You can do it almost anywhere and it's even… — Daisy Copy Share Image
“A premature death does not only rob one of the countless instances where one would have experienced pleasure, it also saves one… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
I thought it's very funny that I ended up as a voiceover guy because when I started out as an actor, I… — D. B. Sweeney Copy Share Image
Wrestling is obviously fake. Why would two people fight over a belt when neither of them are wearing pants? — Michael De Leon Copy Share Image
Inside me theres a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes — Bob Thaves Copy Share Image
We will slaughter them; Bush Junior, and his international gang of bastards! — Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf Copy Share Image
This government is acknowledged by all, to be one of enumerated powers. — John Marshall Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, The process that turns a female from an attraction into a distraction; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Yeah it's so funny calling someone out on twitter, but you don't realize how easy words can kill. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The only reason women need men around the house is because we haven't made a vibrator that can kill spiders. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If someone ever asks you to do something for them, do it really bad so you never have to do it again. — Paris Hilton Copy Share Image
Whenever I see a Caution: slippery when wet sign I hide it somewhere, then I sit down & enjoy the show. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
We are more heavily invested in the theories of failure than we are in the theories of success. — Albert Bandura Copy Share Image
I write the songs first and in most cases teach myself the technique second. — Joe Satriani Copy Share Image
I'm in a situation with this girl that's as hopeless as overthrowing the Bush administration. — Aziz Ansari Copy Share Image
“I'm English. We're about as tactful as a hot poker up the bum, most of the time.” — L.H. Thomson Copy Share Image
Never trust a man who combs his hair straight from his left armpit. — Alice Roosevelt Longworth Copy Share Image
