For he was likely, had he been put on, to have proved most royally. — William Shakespeare Copy Share Image
I can't edit the materials I work with. My remit is to work with nature as a whole. — Andy Goldsworthy Copy Share Image
What if when we die the light at the end of the tunnel is, The opening of another Vagina — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Canada Day is a great reminder to move to Canada if any of the current Republican presidential candidates win. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I dont understand why they have push or pull tags on the doors while it opens both sides of the store..!! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Being in a male-dominated industry, you can feel like a little excluded. That was making me feel like maybe I'm not funny.… — Phoebe Robinson Copy Share Image
What is a date really, but a job interview that lasts all night? The only difference is that in not many job… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“You put a curse on that girl over there,' I tell him. 'Fix her immediately.' 'She admired my ears,' the boy says.… — Holly Black Copy Share Image
“That's the exciting part about capitalism. It's like surfing, you have to catch the wave. - Martin Peter (aka Vermin Gobsmack)” — Jamie Delano Copy Share Image
Once you've made the decision to move on, don't move back. You will never find your future in the rear view mirror. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invaribly they are… — Albert Einstein Copy Share Image
You are quite the beauty. If no one has ever told you that before, know that right now. You are quite the… — Anis Mojgani Copy Share Image
2 Guys in a health club, one is putting on pantyhose. "Since when do you wear pantyhose?" "Since my wife found it… — Henny Youngman Copy Share Image
But I still had to tell myself, Keep looking up. I will tell you, he isnt Superman for nothing. — Erica Durance Copy Share Image
If you think experts are expensive . . . wait and see what amateurs cost you. — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
“It was funny if you looked at it right quick, but it got pitiful if you thought about it awhile.” — Zora Neale Hurston Copy Share Image
That moment, when you and your best friend look at each other and know what you both are thinking and laugh. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You know, I don't know if you know this about me or not, but I'm kind of a big deal. — Eminem Copy Share Image
Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada: Self-preserving, but open to meeting new people. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Bad evangelism says: I'm right, you're wrong, and I would love to tell you about it — Timothy Keller Copy Share Image
If you really want to make a lot of money, start your own religion. — L. Ron Hubbard Copy Share Image
Blasphemy has always seemed to require taking things very seriously. — Donna J. Haraway Copy Share Image
“I want to woo you with food now that I've wooed you with words, song, and the magic of my interpretive dance.” — Stacey Jay Copy Share Image
White people you did not get a receipt for niggas, you can not return us! — Katt Williams Copy Share Image
All that money can do is buy us some one else's work in exchange for our own. — Henry Ford Copy Share Image
Because of acid, I now know that butter is way better than margarine. — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
There's no way you ask Sean Penn a question and then, you're gonna be HUGE ! — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
“You can’t tel me I’m not breaking up with you when I’m breaking up with you!” — Kristen Ashley Copy Share Image
I turned my phone onto Airplane mode and threw it up into the air. Worst. Transformer. Ever. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
