Im too shy to express my sexual needs except over the phone to people I dont know. — Garry Shandling Copy Share Image
“Before you eat the elephant, make sure you know what parts you want to eat.” — Todd Stocker Copy Share Image
I have not got accustomed to English life. The food is truly disastrous and it rains all the time. — Patrice Evra Copy Share Image
You can never go too far wrong by thinking like a customer who’s new to the business. — Richard Branson Copy Share Image
Friendship Day is the perfect time to not reflect on the friends I've methodically erased from my life. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's funny if someone post something in their wall with nonsense just to catch up the attention of others. — Mitch Alapan Copy Share Image
Let's all admit we all pick the Dorito that looks like it has the most flavor on it. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
There have been so many discussions about my weight: How is she going to lose weight? Is she going to lose weight?… — Chrissy Metz Copy Share Image
“She gave me money to buy condoms, and instead I bought a book of baby names. That’s life. That’s love. That’s fiscally… — Dark Jar Tin Zoo Copy Share Image
Advice of the Day: Sometimes you have to try not to care, no matter how much you do because sometimes you mean… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I want to push that no matter what race you are, you're never just a sidekick or broken character. You're the main… — Lexi Underwood Copy Share Image
“Did you just call me a numpty?" "Yup. A delusional one." "What, may I ask, is a numpty?" "A person demonstrating a… — Samantha Young Copy Share Image
Y'all should be happy for me. It's funny, compared to my peers, my catalog isn't even that big, but I'm still getting… — Saweetie Copy Share Image
“Lachlain and Emma: 'So you expect us to sit in this enclosed compartment the entire way in silence?' 'Of course not.' She… — Kresley Cole Copy Share Image
“He's not my boyfriend." "Ha. That's a good one. I saw you two tonsil surfing out there." I could kill her. "I… — Carrie Jones Copy Share Image
You can create many lies from Truth, but you cannot create any truths from lies. — Suzy Kassem Copy Share Image
A false idea is not only one which is absolutely subjective but one which is absolutely objective. — A. D. Gordon Copy Share Image
You can't live off potential for the rest of your life. So get up, get out and go get you some! — Eric Thomas Copy Share Image
I've never really thought of myself as depressed so much as I am paralyzed by hope. — Maria Bamford Copy Share Image
I think my baby might be connected to Al-Qaeda the way she blows up her diapers. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
You didn't elect me to tell you what you wanted to hear. You elected me to tell you the truth. — Barack Obama Copy Share Image
“And you look beautiful," she added. "I look like a cake." "But a beautiful cake.” — Andrea Cremer Copy Share Image
Right and truth are greater than any power, and all power is limited by right. — Benjamin Whichcote Copy Share Image
The only principle I can see in this life, is that one must forfeit the less for the greater. — D. H. Lawrence Copy Share Image
I finally moved out of my parents' house. It was only fair to let my sister have her own room. — Kate Winslet Copy Share Image
In the past we greeted people by removing our hat and now we greet by removing our ear-phones — Shubhz Copy Share Image
Every day starts with a snooze and ends with setting an alarm again for the next morning. — Sonam Arora Luthra Copy Share Image
Why should we flagellate ourselves for what the Cambodians did to each other? — Henry A. Kissinger Copy Share Image
This Is The Beginning Of A New Day! You Have Been Given This Day To Use As You Will! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
You're coming to Buzzfeed's homepage not for yourself, but to find something to share with someone else. — Jonah Copy Share Image
Are you single? No, I'm double. No…I mean are you free Saturday? No I'm espensive. XD!!! — Rachel Copy Share Image
