Yo its funny how all the chickens be always servin us. All up in between they ass where they wanna carry us. — Busta Rhymes Copy Share Image
Need an excuse to end a conversation? Try this: Fuck I have to go, my goldfish is drowning — Anonymous Copy Share Image
God is most certainly not threatened by science; He made it all possible. — Francis Collins Copy Share Image
Let's celebrate Columbus day by walking into someone's house and telling them we live there now. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
God requireth not an uniformity of Religion to be inacted and inforced in any civill state. — Roger Williams Copy Share Image
21 is the age of responsibility. Give it a few months and you will be wondering why you were in such a… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
30 Rock' is superbly funny - it's unashamedly odd, loud and cartoony. There are physical jokes, clever jokes, dumb jokes, character jokes… — Lou Sanders Copy Share Image
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
What people really want is not to make something funny, but to make something amusing - which, in many ways, is the… — Christian Finnegan Copy Share Image
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 now, and we don't know where the hell she is. — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
I've told so many stories to so many friends of mine. I have friends in Pittsburgh, in West Virginia, and in Indy.… — Pat McAfee Copy Share Image
“[novan]: bassists are very good with their fingers [novan]: and some of us sing backup vocals, so that means we're good with… — Jess C Scott Copy Share Image
That's the easiest job you can have in TV comedy, being the guy who just delivers the funny. — Josh McDermitt Copy Share Image
The THINGS that COUNT most IN LIFE ARE the THINGS that CAN'T BE COUNTED. — Zig Ziglar Copy Share Image
Cat city meow,cat cat city meow,mil mil milk that came from a country cow — Wes Campton Copy Share Image
Gari in Russian means "burn!"... I want to test myself, a trial by fire, so that my I is burned off. — Romain Gary Copy Share Image
When you only have $3.00 and you must choose between gas or Mc.Donald's . THE STRUGGLE IS REAL! — Dj Adams Copy Share Image
Charles was constitutionally incapable of being a constitutional monarch. — Simon Schama Copy Share Image
... the science we are after is not about mathematicals either none of them, you see, is separable. — Aristotle Copy Share Image
A scientist describes what is. An engineer creates what never was. — Theodore von Karman Copy Share Image
The only time I talk to a woman when I'm naked is when she's on top of me or I'm on top… — Jack Morris Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you say Goodbye! to someone but you both walk off in the same direction. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I'm sure this is a diversionary ploy. But that doesn't mean it isn't real." -Abe Sapien” — John Arcudi Copy Share Image
Only when I follow my love for my objective is it I myself who act. — Rudolf Steiner Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw that you cared, and I wanted to be everything that I could be. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The number one rule of comedy acting is 'don't try to be funny.' Act as seriously as possible. — Daniel J. Goor Copy Share Image
It was funny, when I got to Australia to The Presidents Cup, I ate about 6,000 calories. — Bryson DeChambeau Copy Share Image
“#Twitter: proudly promoting ghastly grammar and silly misspelling since 2006.” — E.A. Bucchianeri Copy Share Image
My girlfriends are my most valuable possessions, thats why I keep them locked up in closet. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Life is too Short to safely unplug USB, the patient dog dosen't get any bone nowadays. — Yallos Rabiu Copy Share Image
![“[novan]: bassists are very good with their fingers [novan]: and some of us sing backup vocals, so that means we're good with our mouths too... (~ IM chat with Novan Chang, 18, bassist)” quote by Jess C Scott](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e36/jess-c-scott-15952_asian_novan-bassists-are-very-good-with-their_2792760.jpg)
