Funny Quotes · Page 627

I am where I am because I believed and I never gave up...

— Kurt Warner

That's what makes great products. It's not process-it's content.

— Steve Jobs

Can't pick and choose when you're gonna be a leader. If you're gonna be it - gotta do it every day.

— Rajon Rondo

Girls, if you want us guys to come over you have to give us gas money!

— Anonymous

No one's tried to stab me. That's cool. I enjoy not being stabbed.

— Darren Criss

If a temple is to be erected, a temple must be destroyed .

— Friedrich Nietzsche

Relativity is a purely scientific matter and has nothing to do with religion.

— Albert Einstein

“Sometimes it wasn't easy to be polite to someone who locked you in a mudpit”

— Samantha Boyette

If you don't do a lot stupid things when you're young. You wont have funny things to talk about when you're old.

— Anurag Prakash Ray

I love you guys , you's are like my second family &' honestly mean the world to me if it wasn't for…

— Anonymous

For two people in a marriage to live together day after day is unquestionably the one miracle the Vatican has overlooked.

— Bill Cosby

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you feed a stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be…

— Nikhil Saluja

What if the idea of everything being legal for a night was for real.. I would park in a no park zone…

— SouL

I think there's an interesting contradiction of having a young face and an old soul. There's something funny about it, and it…

— Matt Smith

The panda is a funny, lovable animal, which defends its territory well. It's strong but calm. It suits me perfectly.

— Metta World Peace

I am a candid interview and I have a dark and dry sense of humor - a very Canadian sense of humor…

— Michael Buble

Girls eyebrows these days be looking like they got sponsored by nike

— Anonymous

No man leaves where he is and seeks a distant place unless he is in some respect a failure.

— James A. Michener

Music's awesome, it's the closest thing we have to magic.

— Mike Dirnt

I finally concluded that all failure was from a wobbling will rather than a wobbling wheel.

— Frances E. Willard

The girls we want are so hard to get, but the ones we don't want are so hard to get rid of.

— Green Monk

I wanna get inside your pants No offence, but I'm sure they won't fit you.

— Tiaa

Being married is 90% talking about what to have for dinner.

— Ritu Ghatourey

It is not true that sex degrades women... if it is any good.

— Steve Coogan

I wish my phone would stop correcting omg to OMG... I'm not that shocked

— Arjun Loveable

You know your gay when your the only person to like your own stuff on fb. :D

— Delbert

One time I was forced to go to the doctors because of a sports accident. Herpes.

— Mitch Hedberg

Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

— Nikhil Saluja

There is no flattery so adroit or effectual as that of implicit assent.

— William Hazlitt

The fear of death is more to be dreaded than death itself.

— Publilius Syrus

Shake your business up and pour it. I don't have all day.

— Raymond Chandler

Chocolate doesn't ask silly questions. Chocolate understands.

— Anonymous

All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.. :P

— Ritu Ghatourey

I'll be ready in 5 minutes is exactly the same as I'll be home in 5 minutes.

— Ewshy

GOLDEN WORDS ARE NOT REPETED AGAIN AND AGAIN...BECAUSE THE GOLD VALUE IS VERY HIGH...HAHAHAHA

— Sudhakar

Dear future husband, I promise to be faithful but I'll always cheat on you with something... My lipstickð.

— Igbayilola Dosunmu

That sign of old age, extolling the past at the expense of the present.

— Sydney Smith

Replace your self-defeating thoughts with self-supporting thoughts.

— Deepak Chopra

It's so cute when the baby thinks it's going to steal attention from us.

— Anonymous

That sad moment when you can feel you and your best friend slowly drifting apart.

— Anonymous