Bitches be trying act like they single & happy...u single cause ya last name is LEE...UGG-LEE & LONG-LEE — IG:caonte_2_funny Copy Share Image
“You, lass, have a self-image problem.” Well, that might be a little true, but she also had a mirror.” — Cherise Sinclair Copy Share Image
A simple Good morning, beautiful text could make any girl smile for the whole day. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie!"... till you can find a rock. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Don't think about things, just do them; don't predict them, just make them. — Ray Bradbury Copy Share Image
The good news is that even if your early crepes have funny lumps and bulges or aren't paper-thin, they're still gonna be… — J. Kenji Lopez-Alt Copy Share Image
A good neighbor sometimes cuts your morning up to mince-meat of the very smallest talk, then helps to sugar her bohea at… — Elizabeth Barrett Browning Copy Share Image
“You have better luck than you think you do,” Cian said firmly. Turning back toward him, she said, “Yeah? Prove it?” You… — Rhiannon Frater Copy Share Image
Women have a passion for mathematics. They divide their age in half, double the price of their clothes, and always add at… — Marcel Achard Copy Share Image
“True love is jealousy in disguise: A man cannot restrict his lover from going to the club because he hates her, he… — Michael Bassey Johnson Copy Share Image
No babies on this plane. I don't want to be the one crying & puking for the entire duration of the flight… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I was once in Delhi and one guy looked at me and shouted, 'kutiya, kutiya, kutiya' - it is a dialogue from… — Vishwajeet Pradhan Copy Share Image
An American judo fighter was expelled from the Olympics after testing positive for marijuana. Officials became suspicious when he kept stopping the… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
When you identify yourself with a group of people or a set of ideas, aren't you separating yourself? — Jiddu Krishnamurti Copy Share Image
Brushing your teeth six times before you go to the dentist so they think you have really good teeth. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I hate when a shower only has 2 options. 3rd degree burns or skinny dipping in Antarctica. — Xuan Ta Copy Share Image
It is not possible to make a bad law. If is is bad, it is not a law. — Carrie Nation Copy Share Image
There are truths of which I have an inkling, but of most I have only a pencilling — Robert Breault Copy Share Image
“He spun out enough toilet paper to vandalize a house and carefully cleaned the seat.” — Adam Rex Copy Share Image
Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Experience is a funny thing. You dont always have it when you need it. — Patrick Chan Copy Share Image
You can always rely on a society of equals taking it out on the women. — Alan Sillitoe Copy Share Image
That's here on CBS, where the 'C' stands for 'Classy' and the 'BS' speaks for itself. — Craig Ferguson Copy Share Image
The field of consciousness is tiny. It accepts only one problem at a time. — Antoine de Saint-Exupery Copy Share Image
Every father thinks that his son is an idiot, but only my dad is right. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'm usually always very happy and funny and positive. It's only when I'm tired that I get a little low energy. — Nargis Fakhri Copy Share Image
Is it man that possesses love, or is it not much rather love that possesses man? — Ludwig Feuerbach Copy Share Image
My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs. — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
