Funny Quotes · Page 59

There's bad and then there's EDDY CURRY BAD.

— Chris Rock

Art disturbs, science reassures.

— Georges Braque

We're quietly aching for something to celebrate

— Mark Nepo

Every city began as a campsite - pg. 25

— Chris Ware

Peace will come when people have food.

— Momofuku Ando

Decide whether you want to be liked or admired.

— Eve Ensler

You have to reinvent to stay fresh, to stay in the game

— Madonna Ciccone

Whatever power I exert is collegial.

— Katharine Graham

You know it's gonna be a great story when it starts off with, 'So this b*tch...'

— Anonymous

A painting is not a picture of an experience, but is the experience.

— Mark Rothko

Rich Boy meets [smart]hot girl... hot girl meets money. Rich boy meets [dumb] hot girl... hot girl meets love.

— MrAwesome

Creativity makes life useful to us. It also makes us useful to life.

— Julia Cameron

A jealous woman carrys out better investigation than the FBI.

— Tash Carter

Alcohol, firearms and a 4 wheel drive can go a long ways towards making a rain day into a fun rest day.

— Frank Stock

Haters are just confused admirers because they can't figure out the reason why everyone loves you.

— Jeffree Star

A woman can humiliate any man by simply saying . . Hold my purse. in Day & Is It In ? At Night

— Green Monk

I just bought a Chihuahua. It's the dog for lazy people. You don't have to walk it. Just hold it out the…

— Anthony Ward Clark

The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly greater than that of any other animal. Some of…

— H. L. Mencken

“Don't mind her," Kip said to Nicki. "She's just crabby from the long ride." "Yeah, I've been riding with...I mean on...a horse's…

— Shawn Keenan

The world would be a better place if everyone took a chill pill. It would get even better if some of them…

— Anonymous

Eenie meenie miney mo, caught you cheating with that hoe, tried to lie right through my face, think again you've been replaced

— Avalon

You ever go to shop for tuna, and it says "dolphin safe", and you look at it and kind of go, "Yeah,…

— Louis C. K

“I had a dream about you. You were you, but you were many—a multitude of mannequins, each named Manny. And I was…

— Dora J. Arod

We do all like to get things inside a barb-wire corral. Especially our fellow-men. We love to round them up inside the…

— D. H. Lawrence

I don't put pressure on myself. I just compete.

— Allen Iverson

“The fat Sentry has some scrambled eggs.”

— P.T. Macias

O, how full of briers is this working-day world!

— William Shakespeare

Acting is an empty and useless profession.

— Marlon Brando

His money is twice tainted: taint yours and taint mine.

— Mark Twain

If it's funny, I'll do anything.

— Cloris Leachman

I wish I weren’t reeling at all.

— Frank O'Hara

A fool and his money are soon partying.

— Steven Wright

You can't legislate stupidity.

— Jesse Ventura

R u ready 4 the walking dead 2night I am

— Anyone

There is no advance without strife.

— Philip Wylie

Fish are friends, not food! -Bruce

— Finding Nemo

I can Kill two stones. With one bird.

— Nikhil Saluja

Your Disinterest, Makes Me Interested…

— Pacifiersucker

The only church that illuminates is a burning church.

— Buenaventura Durruti

My neighbor never says I love you too. What a weirdo.

— Green Monk