I'm a writer. I write not only for a living, I write because I'm a writer. — Gary Jennings Copy Share Image
If you don’t do something differently, you’ll ultimately be where you are now, only later. — Todd Duncan Copy Share Image
Listen closely when your kiddo tell you their dreams. Just puke on them when they laugh. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
D'you know, I put so much petrol in me car the other day, I couldn't get in! — Vic Reeves Copy Share Image
Even as a kid I was never the generator of humor, but I always knew who was funny, who to hang out… — Andrew Stanton Copy Share Image
There are so many scams on the Internet now...Send me $19.95 and I will tell you how to avoid them. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I never liked wrestling, but I thought The Rock was brilliant, and that is a statement to how funny he is that… — James Acaster Copy Share Image
Being a good husband is like being a good stand-up comic - you need ten years before you can even call yourself… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
If you get busted by a cop for growing weed in your house, just say 'I'm not selling that. It's for personal… — Alec Straub Copy Share Image
“You realize people like you and Trav are going to fight, right?" America said, filing her nails as she chewed the huge… — Jamie McGuire Copy Share Image
A romantic comedy has to be funny and make you think about life; but the obstacle that has to be overcome is… — Jennifer Lopez Copy Share Image
I'd like to wish you a happy and healthy new year by making a sound terrifying enough to give you a heart… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I know the struggles that are ahead in my life and I know the struggles that are ahead in your life. It's… — Glenn Beck Copy Share Image
There is nothing that can be said by mathematical symbols and relations which cannot also be said by words. The converse, however,… — Clifford Truesdell Copy Share Image
