My husband is so gregarious and open and funny and such a people person. — Jeremiah Brent Copy Share Image
We are not to tell nature what she’s gotta be. She's always got better imagination than we have. — Richard P. Feynman Copy Share Image
A man goes to a psychiatrist. "Nobody listens to me!" The doctor says, "Next!" — Henny Youngman Copy Share Image
Walter Plinge, the inventor of predictive text, has died. His funfair will be hello on sundial. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
Every time I hear a song that reminds me of my ex I have a strong erg to punch the radio. — Ambri Bright Copy Share Image
Women are like elephants to me: nice to look at, but I wouldn't want to own one. — WC Fields Copy Share Image
It's funny, but I always feel really safe on the streets of London. It's the most inspiring place to be in the… — Pete Doherty Copy Share Image
I am single, I don't drink. It's kind of hard to get a woman buzzed when you don't drink. You'll be like,… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
I was walking around bored one day, and I started filming stuff with my cellphone. There are all these shows where people… — Harland Williams Copy Share Image
It's funny, I used to say on 'That 70's Show', you could really put us in any decade, and it was about… — Laura Prepon Copy Share Image
In every show that you see, there's some stuff that's funny and some stuff that is not, or there might be stuff… — Mandira Bedi Copy Share Image
“As Confucius once said, "He who does nothing is the one who does nothing."' Gabby pondered the words, the furrowed her brow.… — Nicholas Sparks Copy Share Image
My parents' marriage is a gift to everyone around them - 60 years of making their kids laugh. How many parents are… — Louise Erdrich Copy Share Image
The hardest thing about losing your short term memory is… 'Happy Birthday' Yes it's someone's Happy Birthday isn't o_O — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
