You can't find a hermit to teach you herming, because of course that rather spoils the whole thing. — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“His granny taught him to read, see. I reckon it overheated his mind.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Vimes awoke with a noseful of camel. There are far worse awakenings, but not as many as you might think.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
Give anyone a lever long enough and they can change the world. It's unreliable levers that are the problem. — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The smug mask of virtue triumphant could be almost as horrible as the face of wickedness revealed.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The commander went, as they say in Ankh-Morpork, totally Librarian on them.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
At least I know I'm bewildered about the really fundamental and important facts of the universe. — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
And it came to pass that in time the Great God Om spake unto Brutha, the Chosen One: "Psst! — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
Nature abhors a lot of things, including vacuums, ships called the Marie Celeste, and the chuck keys for electric drills. — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Nanny Ogg gave this the same consideration as would a nuclear physicist who'd just been told that someone was banging two bits… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
Words are the litmus paper of the minds. If you find yourself in the power of someone who will use the word… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“In front of her the cat Greebo, glad to be home again, lay on his back with all four paws in the… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Ah, I know that," said Tiffany, as the boat rocked on the swell. "Whales aren't dangerous, because they just eat very small… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“A number of religions in Ankh-Morpork still practiced human sacrifice, except that they didn't really need to practice any more because they… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
It was possibly the most circumspect advance in the history of military maneuvers, right down at the bottom end of the scale… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“People look down on stuff like geography and meteorology, and not only because they're standing on one and being soaked by the… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Someone broke from the scrum and, punching and kicking, staggered towards the Klatchian goal. "Isn't that man your butler?" said Ahmed. "Yes."… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“There was a steady drizzle when they left for the tower. Moist drove the cart, with the others sitting on the load… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
The thing is, 'Discworld' had been going on for a very long time, and I've written children's books as well. Usually when… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Look down, your grace," said Skimmer. "Mhm, mhm." Vimes realized he could feel the faintest prick of a knife blade on his… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“He sat back and drank the really horrible tea the dwarfs made. Just for a moment there was an unusual feeling on… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Vimes was already lost. Oh, there was the sun, but that was just a direction . He could feel it on the… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
God moves in extremely mysterious, not to say, circuitous ways. God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
You can't map a sense of humor. Anyway, what is a fantasy map but a space beyond which There Be Dragons? On… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“That --ing zombie is going to end up on the end of a couple of --ing handy and versatile kebab skewers,' said… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“ Click. The salamander flared, etching the room with searing white light and dark shadows. Otto screamed. He fell to the floor,… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Oh, good grief," said Vimes. "Look, it's quite simple, man. I was expected to go "At last, alcohol!", and chugalug the lot… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Have - have you got an appointment?' he said. 'I don't know,' said Carrot. 'Have we got an appointment?' 'I've got an… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The plain old Sam Vimes had fought back. He got rid of most of the plumes and the stupid tights, and ended… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Two uniformed trolls were standing in front of Sergeant Colon's high desk, with a slightly smaller troll between them. This troll was… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“The world rides through space on the back of a turtle. This is one of the great ancient world myths, found wherever… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Is that you, Sergeant Angua?" said a voice in the gloom. A lantern was open, and lit the approaching face of Constable… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Welcome to fear , Moist said to himself. It's hope, turned inside out.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what's the point MY POINT EXACTLY. — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image