To really enjoy drugs you've got to want to get out of where you are. But there are some wheres that are… — P. J. O'Rourke Addiction Copy Share Image
There is no virtue in compulsory government charity, and there is no virtue in advocating it. A politician who portrays himself as… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will… — P. J. O'Rourke Children Copy Share Image
I like fiction and the kind of history that gives the grace and flavor of fiction to the past. No bloviation on… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
...let's talk about soccer scores. There are a few things that people all around the world need to admit to themselves. Trade… — P. J. O'Rourke Around the world Copy Share Image
Children from the age of five to ten should watch more television. Television depicts adults as rotten SOB's given to fistfights, gunplay,… — P. J. O'Rourke Adults Copy Share Image
We also have a lot of the same influences - we both read a lot of the beatniks. And yet what we… — P. J. O'Rourke Beatnik Copy Share Image
Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Whenever government proposes to get involved in the regulation of trade, just be very, very careful about who's behind this proposal, what… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Anyhow, all mankind's ideas and interests, all human aims and motives, are exhibited, fully formed, in a three-year-old child. The kid is… — P. J. O'Rourke Advantage Copy Share Image
New Hampshire polling data are unreliable because, when you call the Granite State's registered Republicans and independents in the middle of dinner… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Bill Clinton is not a hypocrite. If a man believes that it is just and moral to redistribute wealth, there is nothing… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I was never in the office [of Rolling Stone]. It was very different from Lampoon, where we spent a lot of time… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I understand Twitter has become popular among politicians. This technology allows them to stay in perpetual contact with their constituents. The electorate… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything… — P. J. O'Rourke Behavior Copy Share Image
Politics are for foreigners with their endless wrongs and paltry rights. Politics are a lousy way to get things done. Politics are,… — P. J. O'Rourke Compassion Copy Share Image
The U.S. Constitution is less than a quarter the length of the owner's manual for a 1998 Toyota Camry, and yet it… — P. J. O'Rourke Constitution Copy Share Image
I can understand why mankind hasn't given up war. During a war you get to drive tanks through the sides of buildings… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The Lampoon started in 1970, and I began writing freelance for them around the end of 1971, and then all through '72.… — P. J. O'Rourke Chiefs Copy Share Image
Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government do it to somebody else. This is the… — P. J. O'Rourke Foreign policy Copy Share Image
“What I believed in the Sixties: Everything. You name it. What I believe now: Nothing. Well, nothing much. Like, things that can… — P. J. O'Rourke Experiment Copy Share Image
The Chinese had gunpowder, but it didn't occur to them to put it in a gun. They possessed the compass but didn't… — P. J. O'Rourke China Copy Share Image
I know quite a few fellow members of the news analysis and commentary business, and I have it from the highest-placed sources,… — P. J. O'Rourke Analysis Copy Share Image
If you spend seventy-two hours in a place you've never been, talking to people whose language you don't speak about social, political,… — P. J. O'Rourke Complexity Copy Share Image
There is only one basic human right: the right to do as you please, without causing others harm. With it comes our… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
There are artists with palettes and easels selling the kind of modern art that Soviet art critics used to critique with bulldozers.… — P. J. O'Rourke Art Copy Share Image
If a journalist shows a facility for praise he's liable to be offered a job in public relations or advertising and the… — P. J. O'Rourke Advertising Copy Share Image
One of the annoying things about believing in free will and individual responsibility is the difficulty of finding somebody to blame your… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Computers seem a little too adaptively flexible, like the strange natives, odd societies, and head cases we study in the social sciences.… — P. J. O'Rourke Care Copy Share Image
The problem with public school is not overcrowding in the classroom. The problem is not teacher unions. The problem is not underfunding… — P. J. O'Rourke Classroom Copy Share Image
Supposedly, summer vacation happens because that's when the kids are home from school, although having the kids home from school is no… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The idea of a news broadcast once was to find someone with information and broadcast it. The idea now is to find… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I was told to hand over my disposable lighter, to prevent, I suppose, any threat of "Do what I say or I'll… — P. J. O'Rourke Air travel Copy Share Image
If you want to join the Republican party, they have to let you in. There's nothing they can do about it. I… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Men generally pay for all expenses on a date ... either sex, however, may bring a little gift, its value to be… — P. J. O'Rourke Dating Copy Share Image
I live in rural New Hampshire, and we are, frankly, short on people who are black, gay, Jewish, and Hispanic. In fact,… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
There is that kind of happiness. There is the love and marriage and family kind of happiness, which is exceedingly boring to… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
There are selves too big for one person to contain. You cannot call them selfish. There is nothing -ish about such selves.… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Any person who has spent time outdoors actually doing something, such as hunting and fishing as opposed to standing there with a… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
People are always angry at America. They're absolutely certain that America either caused their problems or is deliberately not fixing their problems.… — P. J. O'Rourke America Copy Share Image
![“We also have a lot of the same influences - we both read a lot of the beatniks. And yet what we actually do is almost exactly the opposite. His [ Hunter S. Thompson] political stuff is just wonderful, but basically nothing happens.” quote by P. J. O'Rourke](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/886/p-j-o-rourke-184_beatnik_we-also-have-a-lot-of-the-same-influence_3236099.png)
![“I was never in the office [of Rolling Stone]. It was very different from Lampoon, where we spent a lot of time together socially, which is to say "drunk."” quote by P. J. O'Rourke](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/86a/p-j-o-rourke-184_different_i-was-never-in-the-office-of-rolling-sto_1215458.jpg)
