Generally, the path of least resistance appeals. Also, I am superb at parallel parking. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If life hands you lemons, make lemonade; if it hands you tomatoes, make vegetable stew. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“Remember what you won't get if you don't mind," her grandfather remarked.” — Flannery O'Connor Copy Share Image
A woman may have a witty tongue or a stinging pen but she will never laugh at her own individual shortcomings. — Irvin S. Cobb Copy Share Image
wit, wit! - I look upon it always as a draught of air; it cools indeed, but one gets a stiff neck… — Katharina Elisabeth Goethe Copy Share Image
Kindness : I never will understand all the good that a simple smile can accomplish. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I do this real moron thing, and it's called thinking. And apparently I'm not a very good American because I like to… — George Carlin Copy Share Image
A good church is a Bible-centered church. Nothing is as important as this--not a large congregation, a witty pastor, or tangible experiences… — Alistair Begg Copy Share Image
HUSBAND, FAITHFUL, That man who is married to a trusting wife (a definition that can be either truthful or cynical) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'd like to do music in the same way - in a witty way. People think of YG artists as rarely appearing… — Seungri Copy Share Image
Do you want to make money from Facebook? It's easy. Just go to your Account Setting, Deactivate your account, and Go To… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I Followed you, I starred you, I retweeted you, I DM'ed you, I lost you, I blocked you, I never wanna see… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
“Nervousness and excitement were two sides of the same coin, but Vere still couldn’t make heads or tails of what he was… — Merry Knightly Copy Share Image
On his daughter's diaper: There was so much poop. It didn't look like a baby's poop. It looked like a 55-year-old alcoholic… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters. — David Gerrold Copy Share Image
LOVER(S), A person who could only be more perfect if your partner turned into a pizza at 4:00 am — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When it comes to sex and phone calls, I have mastered the art of keeping them under a few minutes. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I was so naive as a kid I used to sneak behind the barn and do nothing. — Johnny Carson Copy Share Image
Philosopher: A masochistic fool who will be considered a genius once dead. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sex can lead to nasty things like herpes, gonorrhea, and relationships. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If she's still able to walk to the kitchen after sex, you don't deserve a sandwich. — Psyche_Zeroh Copy Share Image
A witty illustration or an apt story will accomplish more than columns of argument. — Chauncey Depew Copy Share Image
If sex were shoes, I'd wear you out. But I wouldn't wear you out in public. — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
Wit, to be well defined, must be defined by wit itself; then it will be worth listening to. — Johann Georg Ritter von Zimmermann Copy Share Image
BRB Have to run to the toilet, but I'll be back in two shakes of a man's penis. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you. — Groucho Marx Copy Share Image
Im Kail, I was given a girls name when I was a baby because my parents are idiots. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I can't believe it's already ummm yeah whatever month of the whatever year this is! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Wit is that which has been often thought, but never before was well expressed. — Samuel Johnson Copy Share Image
There's nothing wrong with you that a little Prozac and a polo mallet can't cure. — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
If you follow me & expect a follow back, please do let me know! So I can block you. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Money cant buy happiness but it can buy fabulous things which can totally make you d happiest — Vedica Copy Share Image
Without our immigrants, who will kick our field goals, or train our white tigers? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there — Anonymous Copy Share Image
