“Language is my whore, my mistress, my wife, my pen-friend, my check-out girl. Language is a complimentary moist lemon-scented cleansing square or… — Stephen Fry Copy Share Image
“When the waiter brought the cheese-board, there was a large carrot carved in the shape of a mermaid sitting between the Dolcelatte… — Michelle Lovric Copy Share Image
“We offered her flowers and signalled to her with our penises, but she did not respond with joy.' 'The men with the… — Margaret Atwood Copy Share Image
“The strong man lit a cigarette. It looked too frail for his hand. They looked like King Kong and Fay Wray, that… — Rupert Thomson Copy Share Image
“Hi. I'm here to enlist. You can't. You aren't human. You see, little fella, we don't do sociological stuff like "interspeciated workplaces."… — Howard Tayler Copy Share Image
“There’s something very comforting about watching a Hugh Grant movie. You know no one’s head will be blown off in the first… — Ali McNamara Copy Share Image
“Are you done briefing the company yet?" "We, um... Haven't gotten through the introductions yet." "Allow me: Time-traveling Kevyn Andreyasn, this is… — Howard Tayler Copy Share Image
But my way of writing is rather to think aloud, and follow my own humours, than much to consider who is listening… — Thomas de Quincey Copy Share Image
“Oh be careful! There they go again!" said the old queen as his string broke spilling his balls over the floor… "Stop… — William Burroughs Copy Share Image
“You mean that because I have no name I cannot die and that you cannot be held answerable for death even if… — Flann O'Brien Copy Share Image
“Denis could think of no logical reason why he should not attempt to mate with Beth Cooper. There were no laws explicitly… — Larry Doyle Copy Share Image
“Since I didn't have a candy wrapper to help me with the bad connection I was about to have, I resorted to… — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
“I liked, as I like still, to make words look self-conscious and foolish, to bind them by mock marriage of a pun,… — Vladimir Nabokov Copy Share Image
“A lot of people come up here and they thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one… — Kathy Griffin Copy Share Image
“An hour ago Cutwell had thumbed through the index of The Monster Fun Grimoire and had cautiously assembled a number of common… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Well, Arminius, I can’t say you’re the most natural horseman I’ve ever seen.’ Arminius sneered down at the men standing around him,… — Anthony Riches Copy Share Image
“No congratulations?’ Derry said cheerfully. ‘No “well done, Derry”? I am disappointed in you, William Pole. There’s not many men could have… — Conn Iggulden Copy Share Image
“Then what do we call you?" another of the heat forms asked. "We are Rutan." "Our species need something a little more… — David A. McIntee Copy Share Image
“So here were the facts: I felt possessive of her. Not in a romantic sort of way, but in a "hit her… — Christina Lauren Copy Share Image
“Centurion! Would you like to be a cavalryman one last time? There are Venicones who escaped when your line was broken to… — Anthony Riches Copy Share Image
I was a weirdo. I wasn't picked on or anything. And I wasn't smarter than the other kids; that's not why I… — Jennifer Lawrence Copy Share Image
“One of the things about football fans in general is that they all think that they’re the same. But they are not.… — Dougie Brimson Copy Share Image
“The executioner's argument was that you couldn't cut of something's head unless there was a trunk to sever it from. He'd never… — Lewis Carroll Copy Share Image
“It commenced raining one day and did not stop for two months. We went through ever different kind of rain they is,… — Winston Groom Copy Share Image
“The Baudelaires' journey up the Vertical Flame Diversion was so dark and treacherous that it is not enough to write “The Baudelaires'… — Lemony Snicket Copy Share Image
“And so Mort came at last to the river Ankh, greatest of rivers. Even before it entered the city, it was slow… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“He didn’t say anything until we approached my trailer. “Truth be told, I was hoping for a goodnight kiss, you know, after… — Sherry Gammon Copy Share Image
“Each day of the week, Kalist indulges himself in a different, secret ritual. On Mondays, he wears cologne. On Tuesdays, he eats… — Carla H Krueger Copy Share Image
“Someone has to do it. It's all very well calling for eye of newt, but do you mean Common, Spotted or Great… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“Ye are a scoundrel, a black-hearted robber and a rogue,' Stubble said cheerily to the grumbling captain. It was his usual way… — Ian Livingstone Copy Share Image
“Do you think the Goblin King really did it?" asked Cordelia hesitantly. All the sheep knew she was talking about George's death.… — Leonie Swann Copy Share Image
“I’d spend hours in HMVs, Virgin Megastores and second-hand record shops staffed by greasy-haired 40-year-olds dressed as 20-year-olds, listening to contemporary music… — Alan Partridge Copy Share Image
“Then he reached to an even higher shelf and brought down another plastic grocery bag, this one from Tesco, which is decidedly… — David Sedaris Copy Share Image
“Edward shifted from one foot to the other, then headed to one of the younger knights from Carrick, leading his horse and… — Robyn Young Copy Share Image
The first step toward the management of disease was replacement of demon theories and humours theories by the germ theory. That very… — Fred Brooks Copy Share Image
In Hollywood everything is so documented. If you go for a drink with somebody, it's passed around the world so quickly. So,… — Catherine Zeta-Jones Copy Share Image
When you say to yourself, 'I am going to have a pleasant visit or a pleasant journey,' you are literally sending elements… — Prentice Mulford Copy Share Image
This false distance is present everywhere: in spy films, in Godard, in modern advertising, which uses it continually as a cultural allusion.… — Jean Baudrillard Copy Share Image
“Pastor Daniel, meanwhile, is sipping water on the balcony of a former sailing clubhouse, I ask if he can show me which… — John Safran Copy Share Image
“On a Tuesday they were we, and by Friday they were dead and they buried them in the courtyard side by side,… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
