It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
What can you say about the family who is suing the railroad after their drunk son was killed walking on the tracks?… — David Sedaris Copy Share Image
“It is time I came back to my real life After this voyage to an island with no name, Where I lay… — May Sarton Copy Share Image
“After all, as Franco would dictate, everyone was going to lose their money at some point. You may as well do so… — Christopher Byford Copy Share Image
The generalizing writer is like the passionate drunk, stumbling into your house mumbling: I know I'm not being clear, exactly, but don't… — George Saunders Copy Share Image
Heterosexuals get drunk and pregnant, producing unwanted children; their reward is to be allowed to marry. Homosexual couples do not produce unwanted… — Richard Posner Copy Share Image
I have drunk of the wine of life at last, I have known the thing best worth knowing, I have been warmed… — Edith Wharton Copy Share Image
One of my life goals is to be a best man. It's a baller position. You get drunk, you make speeches, and… — Aziz Ansari Copy Share Image
When I got into my early 20s, I was going to bed one nightI was still drinking, still using drugs, and probably… — Randy Travis Copy Share Image
“And then, as someone turned the music up by the bar, I kicked off my shoes and I began to dance. It… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“One of the rarest and most beautiful things in this world is to meet someone who has the ability to intoxicate you.… — Richie Singh Copy Share Image
“I'm an old man now. Old on the inside. I'm a drunk, and I hate to tell you, but I'm not prepared… — Suzanne Palmieri Copy Share Image
“Rosie had been a little girl with a dead dad, and there was no getting around that or over that. Even a… — Anne Lamott Copy Share Image
“Reevie . . . I feel wasted.” Her head sways from side to side, her hair hanging in her face. “Will you… — Jenny Han Copy Share Image
It was such a thrill. I found the roughest, toughest girls who love to party. They study and work all day in… — Beccy Cole Copy Share Image
“I'm sorry, but why does Claire know how to take a punch? I'm not sure I like where this is going," Carter… — Tara Sivec Copy Share Image
That's the whole thing with Israel. When they do things and nobody is punishing them, not even criticizing them, then that will… — Tamer Nafar Copy Share Image
Amy: I never knew you drank wine. Doctor: I'm 1103 I must have drunk it sometime in my life. *takes sip and… — Steven Moffat Copy Share Image
You don't know how to handle anything today, because you have to go to jail to get some press or fall down… — Liza Minnelli Copy Share Image
I spilled some vodka on the carpet, and I vacuumed it up, and the vacuum got drunk. I had to take the… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
It's progress I think, that science has joined philosophy, metaphysics & religion as subjects drunk people argue about in bars. — Neil deGrasse Tyson Copy Share Image
It's hot tonight and half the neighborhood is drunk. the other half is dead. if I have any advice about writing poetry… — Charles Bukowski Copy Share Image
I wasn't that drunk! ... Bro, you picked up a little mexican girl & screamed, DORA! I NEED YOUR MAP TO GET HOME! — Jazzjefferies Copy Share Image
If people want to think I get drunk and stay out all night, let'em. That's how I got here you know I… — Dean Martin Copy Share Image
A bird in the boughs sang "June," And "June" hummed a bee In a Bacchic glee As he tumbled over and over… — Clinton Scollard Copy Share Image
“I knew then I was going to die in the street without ever seeing Holly again. All because I tried to help… — Steven Ramirez Copy Share Image
I have so strong a sense of creation, of tomorrow, that I cannot get drunk, knowing I will be less alive, less… — Anais Nin Copy Share Image
I'm not a fan of reality shows, but I am a fan of people who use their brains and skills and hard… — Sandra Bullock Copy Share Image
Faeries are unaffected by alcohol, but much to her surprise—and the faeries’ undoing—they get very, very drunk on carbonation. Using copious amounts… — Kiersten White Copy Share Image
“How many beers do y'all think it takes before one internationally scientist turns to another and says, 'Dude, bet you twenty bucks… — Robyn Schneider Copy Share Image
How sad, a heart that does not know how to love, that does not know what it is to be drunk with… — Omar Khayyam Copy Share Image
The very dogs were all asleep, and the flies, drunk with moist sugar in the grocer's shop, forgot their wings and briskness,… — Charles Dickens Copy Share Image
“enough to qualify him as being drunk, and never so much that he couldn’t remember what he did the next morning. And… — Brian Harmon Copy Share Image
“Tonight," he said, "we shall get quietly and thoroughly drunk...in memory of all that was lost. And on the morrow, I begin… — Sharon Kay Penman Copy Share Image
[Dean Martin] is an absolute, unqualified drunk. And if we ever develop an Olympic drinking team, he's gonna be the coach... Dean… — Frank Sinatra Copy Share Image
St. Patrick's Day is a holy day for Roman Catholics in Ireland to pray and a day for drunk people to vomit… — Margot Leitman Copy Share Image
I do remember being in high school and trying to go to an Outlaws concert, but I was too drunk and ended… — Jim Coleman Copy Share Image
There is something about safari life that makes you forget all your sorrows and feel as if you had drunk half a… — Isak Dinesen Copy Share Image
All the chicks who act crazy love it .Them chicks who stay blunted. Drunk in the middle of the dancefloor like, "Fuck… — Jean Grae Copy Share Image
What white man has ever seen me drunk? Who has ever come to me hungry and left me unfed? Who has seen… — Sitting Bull Copy Share Image
![“Rosie had been a little girl with a dead dad, and there was no getting around that or over that. Even a drunk dad, even an asshole, was better than a dead dad, which shouldn't reflect on you but did, and left a cannon hole in your heart. [p. 121]” quote by Anne Lamott](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/e6b/anne-lamott-188_drunk_rosie-had-been-a-little-girl-with-a-dead_1756634.png)
![“[Dean Martin] is an absolute, unqualified drunk. And if we ever develop an Olympic drinking team, he's gonna be the coach... Dean Martin has been stoned more often than the United States embassies.” quote by Frank Sinatra](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/9aa/frank-sinatra-2702_absolutes_dean-martin-is-an-absolute-unqualified-d_2925769.jpg)
