When I get emotional about something, that's usually when funny comes. — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
If people get their feelings hurt from jokes, then they are too delicate to be in society. — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
There's no getting around it - I am a politically incorrect, racially insensitive, culturally controversial comic, but at least I'm self-aware. — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
I've never seen myself as a victim because of my physicality. If I did play that game, I wouldn't be the comedian… — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
I'm too far to the left for some, too far to the right for others. I'm my own brand of comedy. — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
My audience has accepted me for a long time as, you know, not a fat comedian but a comedian who happens to… — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
Comedy is not about appearance; it's about rockin' a mike. Are they laughing? That's the only test. — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
Last Comic Standing was a great opportunity and it was a great learning experience. Even though I didn't win, I've had more… — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
I don't go to comedy clubs unless I'm working. And when I do work, I come in, I do my time and… — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
When I do jokes that maybe are seen as social commentary, I research them to the nth degree. I probably do more… — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
If I can make you laugh and learn, I want to be like George Carlin and Richard Pryor and Eddie Murphy and… — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
I'm an entertainer first. But I do as a stand up comedian, the way for me to evolve is to make a… — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
I've been called a race traitor, prejudiced about white people. It's ridiculous... I have a really, really diverse crowd. Most comedy clubs… — Ralphie May Copy Share Image
I loved 'Celebrity Fit Club,' working out six days a week, running a mile and a half three times a week, and doing 1,000… — Ralphie May Copy Share
I mean, comics fear sue - you know, lawsuits and stuff like that, just because they don't like to do paperwork. — Ralphie May Copy Share
People have been calling me names and setting me back my whole life. And with every fight it's just given me more fuel to… — Ralphie May Copy Share
I got kids now... It gives you an empathetic feeling into other cultures and stuff. — Ralphie May Copy Share
Comedy is not about appearance; it's about rockin' a mike. Are they laughing? That's the only test. — Ralphie May Copy Share
My jokes aren't predicated on my weight that much. I talk about it some, but it's definitely not the focus, so I don't feel… — Ralphie May Copy Share
I grew up in a little town in Arkansas called Clarksville and it was a weird existence, you know? I grew up white trash;… — Ralphie May Copy Share
You talk to - I had a good fortune of getting to spend a lot of time with Uncle Miltie and guys like Buddy… — Ralphie May Copy Share
The iPhone rules, but it does everything but get a call, you know? I can't tell you how many times my wife has been… — Ralphie May Copy Share
I don't go to comedy clubs unless I'm working. And when I do work, I come in, I do my time and I leave.… — Ralphie May Copy Share
